i confess that my biggest sin was masturbation, also among them is envy and greed. I have been searching in many places for a way to change and now I try to look for redemption to see if it is useful to take the first step. sinto if my English is bad but it's because I come from Spain. Thanks for your time

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I used to wait for the sunrise to go to sleep out of fear. this started about 2003-2008 and then again in 2009 - 2012 and my sister would stay up late evenings on the computer, my sister would come and go from our house and I think between 2000-2003 and 2008-2009 she went away when she was in her 2nd marriage and then in 2nd time she was away she had broken up with the 2nd husband and got with the next and was overseas for a holiday in 2008 approximately and she was in a lets just put it strange Asian country that do a lot of pagan and odd spiritual rituals around Halloween and I still believe she bought back with her a ghost or witch whatever you want to call it, as I heard one freaked out thing just after she came back of a ghoul that was spooky in our hall and part of the kitchen that appears to be haunted. So when she would stay and then moved back in, I would be in my own bedroom watching my laptop and I would stay away all night completely spooked out believing witches and she was out at the computer in another room, but the thing is there were in the neighborhood freaky goings on because of break ins and noises and stalkers who were drunk in our yard and strange things going on as we don't have a front fence, and I swear if I ever came into money that is one thing apart from moving to a better place is put in a front fence to feel safer. but the worst part was in the second period my sister was staying with us, from around the time my grandfather and neighbor died. It was like the fear set in at as the sun was setting and it got to bad when my parents went to bed around say 10 or 11pm and it was always at its worse around 2-3am and I could not sleep or if I did it was not comfortable and I was so afraid. The sunrise was both spooky and a ease to let my body go to rest. I felt like a vampire to be honest. I was sick a lot. I was untrusting of others and I was living a prisoners life but not in jail and no crime. I felt like I was being persecuted and still after all this it would continue as if a dark thing was out to take from me my life and dreams and health. It was making gain weight literally every time I bought a nice clothing to wear so I couldn't fit into it. I don't know if anyone can relate to this at all. It sounds so stupid. I am not as bad mind state as back then but it still impacts me a great deal and the illness and assault.

I used to wait for the sunrise to go to sleep out of fear. this started about 2003-2008 and then aga...

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