man, you’re thinking about it, its kinda good..

Fear of abandonment

is common amongst kids and can be paralyzing in adulthood if not checked.

Especially if someone in your past took advantage of the fear (kids for example, know about the fear, because they have it, and the mean-spirited kids will use it to attack their friends) and try to make you feel like you’re going to be abandoned.

If you then experience actual abandonment on some level and feel it was your fault someone left

(note: it wasn’t! people do things for themselves NOT for others)

then it can have long lasting psychological effects where you put up walls and refuse to let anyone get close to you.

Putting up walls leads to a reduction in your ability to have normal friendships and even normal conversations if it goes on for too long. With increased isolation comes a decrease in social skills NOT because there’s something wrong with you but because you’re not getting any practice in everyday social skills.

which in turn leads to your not wanting to talk to people because it feels increasingly uncomfortable.

Voila, self-fulfilling circular prophecy in which your original (fear of) abandonment led to self-imposed isolation which in turn feeds your fear of abandonment and back again in a vicious downward spiral.

In nomine Patris et Filii et Spiritus Sancti

You are forgiven.

:)

For your penance, please call someone on the phone and have a long conversation (at least 1 hour, preferably 2) and chat with one stranger every day for the next week at the supermarket.

God loves you and so does your family and so will others. If you let them.

Gabriel