my mother's father was in the order of the holy name and mum was in...

the order of the holy mary or some dam thing all these different factions in the catholic church but once those churches upset me I went straight to a priest who had been in rome and I was cranky over a lot of things but I just told him I was trying to deal with all my shit people had dumped on me. that is much the same at the convent and monastry, I don't feel I have to keep proving to them my faith but it ticks me off that they just have a rather blip like attitude. I was never sexually abused by preists or nuns my preditor was in the home and what I was taught to strive for which seemed to be self-denial of everything even life and joyce was was helping me or listening the whole time I paid her she never took a thing I said seriously enough. I can't believe I was reflecting that other then I never believed in my heart that any one cared about me or loved me much. I was picking up messges from people but peolple failed to help me at the right time as a teen when I needed the help. which has been my argument today and its just ticked me off that I always had to prove this faith or worthiness but could never find it for work or marriage or to have a baby and so many people just never understood the real me.

By Anonymous on General,