Sunday's service, I hired a male escort to come into my office, hop on my desk and squat of one of my old testament bibles. I worshipped his feet as he took a giant piss and shit on the front cover. The piss rolled off the turd, onto the desk, then onto my lap and the carpet. He then commanded me to finger my own butt as I ate his shit off my bible until it as all gone. I paid him with 500 dollars of tithe money I'd made that day from the church members.
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