I've been having thoughts. Not suicidal, I want to live but in general I have...

a gut feeling that I won't live to see 2023. I don't know how or why but maybe it is because my other sins have caught up with me and He wants to smite me. I'm not homophobic and I keep these awful feelings deep inside of me but I've had a feeling that God hates me for wanting to date women and that is why I have to die. I don't think homosexuality is a sin but every other Christian I know says it is and sin brings death....

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