indural is a beta blocker but they use it with another therapy for cancer and my doctor kept torturing me saying he was worried I had a cancer tumor in the bladder when I was on indural it was awful. I had to have so many ultrasounds on my uturus and ovaries and kidneys and I had a ovary that was enlarged and I still get a lot of pain there. he was always doing urine blood counts all the time cuz I wouldn't go and have blood tests but I am traumatised over them. my veins collapse too much and they can't take blood with me, I need to be with a good blood taker who can relax me. everyone is stressing me out and money worries. I can see why some people do cause harm over financial worries it has been the story of my life, how to provide for this family, my parents as they getting old and useless and difficult. and I am all alone. I doubt that will change. I can't see any man loving me or marrying me now or having kids. its just not going to happen. I will never own a home or graduate and if I got a job I would be forever paying back hecs debt and never get ahead. that is why I won't go back to university in the old fashion. I have to go interstate soon for a talk with something with a health issue and hope to see a course college there while I am there but I doubt I can afford it all. I need more financial help. I want to work unlike most people. I have had everything valuable taken from me heartlessly. my car and licence was taken going on medications. no one cares about my needs and feelings and dreams. I am a lone ranger as always. some of us were born hateful children and I was one of them. cursed and persecuted by a molesting pedo and I have to carry the guilt and shame for it for the rest of my life ! nothing can be done. i have been suffering and i will be suffering and no one cares at all. and I care about no one either back. and I can make others suffer too! god can harm all the people who made/make me suffer.