no one told me how beautiful I was in my teens and 20s and when they did I knew they were not genuine and sincere. which is why I never know how to accept a compliment now, cuz when I was at my proudest and best no one noticed at all. I wanted people to compliment me. It is weird that now we live in a world were we have to tell people how we want to be treated, how to treat us on our birthday and what we expect and want. I thought I made it clear I don't want anymore shit. and the things I said when I was sick no longer apply now I have different goals. also I have always given better and expect better. it goes without saying.