Last night, I was with my girlfriend in the back seat

Last night, I was with my girlfriend in the back seat of my car, doing all kind of lovemaking Suddenly, and I don't know from where did he come, a police officer showed up knocking on the car and asking us to get dressed and get the hell out of the car we were terrified cause we've been busted, and the problem is that i don't have a driving license, it was my dad's car, and my girlfriend started crying The police officer looked at us for a very long time, then said: I will let you both go under one condition, If you let me fuck you in front of your girlfriend I was shocked, and refused, but he said that I'm already in a deep shit, and i better agree to what he offered I was speechless, so I accepted what he offered and let him fuck me When he finished, he told me to call him later so he will do things again to me. I don't know what to do, I'm terrified and I feel ashamed at myself my girlfriend refuse to talk to me anymore
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we cheated on each other so much and regret is a vile creature. Never leave any regrets in your life. They eat you alive over time. twenty years ago I was 18 and met a guy and we got married after dating 4 months. But he was cheater and liar. I left him soon after we got married. But I have regretted it ever since but he was he is and I knew I deserved better. Its been years and I still could never love him after he had an affair with my sister and a few of her friends and I got photos of their gang bang sent to my facebook page I felt a complete fool infront of all our friends later. But before I left him I messed my life up bad with gambling and my job ment I had to do fifo stays before it was the in thing to do. I did a lot of dumb things during my pregnancies that would be toxic to any relationship. He told me he still loved me last year but I turned him down because he was drunk and back to his old tricks doing porn in vans that made me sick, number 1 he had a too short a dick that was boring to me, number 2 he lazy and never bothered to improve himself or our mix of friends other then the loosers at the pub and soccor clubs. My mistakes would ruin his life? but then his would sure ruin mine. I want him to be snappy even its w/o me. I have a current bf but in my heart, I don't love him. He knows this though, he tries to help me move forward and has a stable job which makes me more stable and I don't see the kids anyway now they are at boarding school which was the best thing no matter how much I resisted it and we argued over custody but boarding school won out and worked out best now we only see them alternate holidays. I try to get over my ex husband cheating me but I can't. Its a real contradiction that we fouled on each other. Now all that is left is regret and it is destroying my sanity but I have a new life and chance. and no more kids.

we cheated on each other so much and regret is a vile creature. Never leave any regrets in your life...