Existential Questions I have a question, (well, probably a lot of them) but like… I don't really expect answers, tho they're definitely welcome. What are you afraid of? I don't mean like "Heights" or "Snakes" (tho those are legit fears, I'm not judging) but I mean like… What stops you from doing things? What scares you into inaction? ARE there things that stop you? (Here be the rant) I was talking to a roommate about something and she essentially told me that I have three choices: Do something, decide it's not right; do something, decide it is right; or do nothing. And she told me that doing nothing was easily my worst choice, but doing nothing (in this matter) has gotten me pretty far. It's not like I never do anything. This is just… a different realm for me. And I kinda opted for inaction, but I don't know why. Is it that it's not right? Is it that I'm scared? Or is it that I just don't care enough? Here's the situation specifically: there's a guy I used to know and I've had a ~feeeling~ that I should reach out to him. Problem being, things between us are… messy. Not like SUPER messy, but we haven't spoken in years and I've embarrassed myself in front of him more times than I can count. So… why am I not reaching out to him? It's not like I haven't done it before with other friends, reaching out after long periods of time. Am I afraid that he'll make fun of me? Am I afraid of him ignoring me? Am I afraid of being hurt? Or am I being patient? Am I waiting for the right opportunity? Do I even care? Does it matter? I am afraid of being rejected, that much is true. I don't know if that's what's worrying me right now. I can't really tell. IDK guys, but I go back to my question: What are you afraid of?

Existential Questions I have a question, (well, probably a lot of them) but like… I don't really expect answers, tho they're definitely welcome. What are you afraid of? I don't mean like "Heights" or "Snakes" (tho those are legit fears, I'm not judging) but I mean like… What stops you from doing things? What scares you into inaction? ARE there things that stop you? (Here be the rant) I was talking to a roommate about something and she essentially told me that I have three choices: Do something, decide it's not right; do something, decide it is right; or do nothing. And she told me that doing nothing was easily my worst choice, but doing nothing (in this matter) has gotten me pretty far. It's not like I never do anything. This is just… a different realm for me. And I kinda opted for inaction, but I don't know why. Is it that it's not right? Is it that I'm scared? Or is it that I just don't care enough? Here's the situation specifically: there's a guy I used to know and I've had a ~feeeling~ that I should reach out to him. Problem being, things between us are… messy. Not like SUPER messy, but we haven't spoken in years and I've embarrassed myself in front of him more times than I can count. So… why am I not reaching out to him? It's not like I haven't done it before with other friends, reaching out after long periods of time. Am I afraid that he'll make fun of me? Am I afraid of him ignoring me? Am I afraid of being hurt? Or am I being patient? Am I waiting for the right opportunity? Do I even care? Does it matter? I am afraid of being rejected, that much is true. I don't know if that's what's worrying me right now. I can't really tell. IDK guys, but I go back to my question: What are you afraid of?
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More from 'Blasphemy' category

I put this under waste because I've wasted my life. Here it goes. I'm bad like really bad. But looking at me you would never know. People are catching on as my life falls apart. I've been living like a quadruple life I guess. I don't even know who I am anymore. I can't think of anything I like. I hate everything and everyone. I have no friends left, the women of my life cheated lied and stole the entire time I've known them. Most of my buddies too. Just users you know. I always offer too much and people gladly accept my generosity. I always try and help but it eventually becomes them being entirely dependent on me. Then they go and I've lost so much in them. I never see the fruits of my labours. Now I'm totally alone. And financially ruined. Relying on booze and drugs to feel better about the shitty person I am. I pray to god thanking him only, not asking for more. He still rewards me a lot. Gives me great opportunity and strength to conquer challenges. But I can't conquer myself. I want to end my life. Nobody would notice except the few leeches who still cling to my generosity. Everybody I've helped is doing great. I never took time to take care of myself, or set myself up better. My friends, wife, in laws, girlfriends, and associates have all benefitted greatly from my efforts but I'm fucked mentally physically and financially. I even still protect people after they betray me. Keep their secrets, bend to their requests. I'm going to blow my brains out. I hate this world, it's ruined anyway. Goodby you fucked up people. There's a good chance that there is someone in your life going through this who helped you a lot. I bet you won't even reach out to repay what's owed. Sick fucking society world wide.

I put this under waste because I've wasted my life. Here it goes. I'm bad like really bad. But loo...