Adultery + Sucidal Thoughts

Well, my wife and I were married in May. By July, I had lost my mind and cheated on her. I admitted this to her after I came off of the medication that caused me to lose it. Anyway, it was too late. She didn't want me anymore. She is the most important part of my life. I just want her back but anytime I speak with her, she just continually berates me and puts me down. I'm thinking of killing myself.