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i lied

LoveLieLose of faithDidnt forgiveHateFight
i lied to everyone at my old school i siad i was adopted i said that i was born in another state just to be popular but then i met a AWSOME guy who only liked me for my lies
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I�m a 22 years old, good looking, italian boy. I read the posts on this site everytime I feel sad, that means in every moment. I�m so depressed. The girlfriend I loved cheated on me, she hurt me so much, I had to leave her after I tried to pardon her. She�s a bitch, but at least she was caring. Now I am worried of girls, but also I desperatly need someone that is caring with me. I started �college� two years ago, I am not studying but I don�t want to work, because I want a work that satisfies me, not a common one. I am very good in writing, but I don�t do anything that going to a stupid, temporary job and losing time playing computer games. I am too sensitive, and for that people thinks that i act strangely. I have few friends, and only one of them that I really like to stay with. I�m falling in love for the girlfriend of a friend. She�s not so beautiful, but she�s really really intelligent and educated. I am pretty and I could have all the girls I want, but I like only inttelligent, educate and sensible ones. Not like my ex. I love my family, but they don�t completly understand me. And they are right always telling me that I�m waisting my life. I don�t see a future for me. I�m a failiure. In everything. Writing, gaming and drinking too much are the only things that I can do. I don�t know why I�m writing this here. I would like someone of you to help me. But noone, obviously, can.

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Is this a mistake? I feel so torn. Part of me wants to love you with every fiber in my body. Another part of me feels resentful and I just want to leave you behind. It's so hard. Because I want to be with you and make you happiest man alive. I go out of my way to try to contact you, even if it just to tell you to have a wonderful day. I always respected to you in anyway I could. I would always cherished the memories that we've had together. Does any of this ever matter to you? It doesn't seem like it. You don't answer me anymore when try to reach out to you. You've been disrespectful to me. Whenever I had talked about the times we've had together you either don't remember shit or pretend it never happened! God you make me so angry! I don't know what goes on inside your head. I can't tell if you're being oblivious or actually fucking with me! If you don't actually care just tell me to fuck off already instead of keeping me in the dark wondering. It's getting more difficult find reasons to still try. I thought I was your friend, but you really me feel like I'm a nobody.

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