what I don't understand with anita is why didn't she just say "thankyou for offering to help with the sausage sizzles and fundraising but just keep doing the singing and if you don't want to do a solo (cuz there was heaps of better people then me who could have that was obvious) or I will place you where you won't feel uncomfortable on stage, when I did public speaking lessons my tutor worked with me to boast up my confidence to do my speach that I thought I could never do but I did, all anita had to say was a few nice words she should not have asked me over to her house and their childish non-sense they were going on with, they had already chosen their dash sponsors so why did she lie to me as some game? why not just be honest and open, and that was what I didn't like also about mary in the psychology. I will not lie about things, I never felt comfortable with ken and that whole situation I was pushed into by leigh and my mum and dad said "don't let that ever happen to you ever again" make it clear to people your not there to be abused not by dirty doctors or dirty priests who have some hidden agendas and fake hearts fake everything but their wallets and skull duggery. yeh anita gets help to write her music she supposedity makes it all to sound deliberately sickly fake "matey" bs! that she can not live up to as a human because she is so evil. but when you have a son of slut bastard useless ill moraled doctor or some other fake man in the middle of it you have trouble. at least anita can't say I didn't help her and her illness - my family have had spine abifita but that doesn't mean she has to be such a pig! there is a way of speaking to someone. she could have just said "I am sorry you are going through this, just keep coming to choir" she went on with all these lies about "I know some of you are having terrible abuse family problems but does she know how bad it is, how violent my sister and father and mother have been to me at times. she makes out she cares infront of people but she doesn't its all about ego and money with her. but like I said she can't say I didn't help her with royalty companions and compliements to their singing birdy! who is not so nice at all. a very nasty witch around a heap of bitches. that is why I complained in that receptionist whores ear because she has everything all these poeple have everything! I wish I could be so selfish.

what I don't understand with anita is why didn't she just say "thankyou for offering to help with the sausage sizzles and fundraising but just keep doing the singing and if you don't want to do a solo (cuz there was heaps of better people then me who could have that was obvious) or I will place you where you won't feel uncomfortable on stage, when I did public speaking lessons my tutor worked with me to boast up my confidence to do my speach that I thought I could never do but I did, all anita had to say was a few nice words she should not have asked me over to her house and their childish non-sense they were going on with, they had already chosen their dash sponsors so why did she lie to me as some game? why not just be honest and open, and that was what I didn't like also about mary in the psychology. I will not lie about things, I never felt comfortable with ken and that whole situation I was pushed into by leigh and my mum and dad said "don't let that ever happen to you ever again" make it clear to people your not there to be abused not by dirty doctors or dirty priests who have some hidden agendas and fake hearts fake everything but their wallets and skull duggery. yeh anita gets help to write her music she supposedity makes it all to sound deliberately sickly fake "matey" bs! that she can not live up to as a human because she is so evil. but when you have a son of slut bastard useless ill moraled doctor or some other fake man in the middle of it you have trouble. at least anita can't say I didn't help her and her illness - my family have had spine abifita but that doesn't mean she has to be such a pig! there is a way of speaking to someone. she could have just said "I am sorry you are going through this, just keep coming to choir" she went on with all these lies about "I know some of you are having terrible abuse family problems but does she know how bad it is, how violent my sister and father and mother have been to me at times. she makes out she cares infront of people but she doesn't its all about ego and money with her. but like I said she can't say I didn't help her with royalty companions and compliements to their singing birdy! who is not so nice at all. a very nasty witch around a heap of bitches. that is why I complained in that receptionist whores ear because she has everything all these poeple have everything! I wish I could be so selfish.
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one physiotherapist I went to when I was really ill did really hard massage on my left shoulder and he said to me "you have an incredible tolerance to pain" and I thought "yeh well don't push it mate!" because he seemed to go all the harded and then said to me "you will feel like you are having a heart attack but your not" sure enough a few days later I was packing off to another doctor beside myself in over my mastoid eventhough all the mri's and ct scans were showing what they said was "nothing" yet the ambulance officer said "there is a good reason why you have been sent to the neurologist/brain surgeon" the heart pain was out of this world serveral times in a few months I thought I was going to die I could tell when my heart was slowing down and I would be pacing around all hours of the night trying to breath and I was seeing another physiotherapist as well for pnemonia treatment and I just wondered why people were doing all this to me? ever since I was a kid people were putting this shit down on me, then all this deliberate isolation like I was some leppa or freakin criminal on parole going to russos answering the big bear gruff which was just insanity. all these doctors and tests all saying "no nothing is wrong, yes you have a ear infection but you won't die" and I was like well why the hell is this driving me insane the infection took forever to go down and once the ent did the surgery on my ear drum I had all this blood on the roof of my mouth for weeks and I couldn't brush my teeth so I was using salt a lot and I couldn't wash my hair because everytime I did it felt like my brain water was swelling and you just get sick of doctors saying shit at you that its like they are taking a bit off you rather then being sincer and polite, and there were a few really good doctors as well. one indian young doctor at the hospital was amazingly thorough, I get really annoyed sometimes because a lot of doctors today forget very basic procedures like BP and pulse and looking into throat and eyes and chest - they are often as lazy as the cops and will take the laziest way out of a case which years ago doctors would never do. I was insulted a number of times and I was warned to shut up and let the situation go and ignore all the bullying and if I said anything it was like I was going to get it I got the warning via other people however, they use other people to talk through them. that is what I don't like its really snide too. and I was not going to back down. I told one indian female doctor to go shove it because I was polite to her and she would giggle and shake her head and say the specialists didn't prescript the right thing or it wouldn't work what they prescribed and I said "I have to trust my gp i have to rely on you to work with my specialists and tell me things if they don't, if you think its an issue say so say why? don't just giggle and she was like "I don't need to read all that from the specialist I am a doctor" and I said yes but I am not! I need you to follow with the speciaist and not have me as lettuce leaf between the sandwich. why are you working against the specialists every time? why do you keep saying they are wrong?" that only puts more doubt and upset on me then making me question them more and more. I don't need anymore doubt I already have plenty, and I don't want anyone ruining my professional relationships with any more of my doctors becausse its annoying having to change doctors I need to settle somewhere and trust what they say. I try my best to ignore as much as I can, but I don't need the unwanted comments that are insulting because believe me, I can be insulting and slash back unexpectly at people too! I have my ways and means of finding peoples secrets out. I will undo people who mess with me, I hate my neighbors for attacking D, he can answer for himsself if he wronged me.

one physiotherapist I went to when I was really ill did really hard massage on my left shoulder and ...