I know God's email!

Or, at least, I created it. I made the email <a href="mailto:iamgodyoumortals@hotmail.com">iamgodyoumortals@hotmail.com</a> and posted it on a public forum, as a joke. (The Hotmail was for a joke, too: HOTmail? Like the devil?) My only thoughts were: <em>Not a single person in the world could believe this.</em> Even if they did, they'll quickly come to their senses after looking at my title (Admin changed it to "Class Clown".) , signature (Admin made it "^The above text is probably satire^"), or avatar (I use my <a href="http://www.newnuma.com/">New Numa</a> avvie that's on here). Well, needless to say (This is a confession, after all, right?), some person emailed it and believed me. They confessed all of their sins to me, and I, still KNOWING that no person could be this stupid, gave them the benefit of the doubt and replied, "It's okay. You have been forgived. Eat lot's of muffins!". Well, they replied back, and said, "OH! THANK YOU GOD! THANK YOU!". I realized now that he wasn't playing, and he really thought it was God. I couldn't tell him then, because it would break his heart, but I was wondering if I can still get forgiveness?
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When I was 16 I was watching my nephews, while my aunt and uncle went out for dinner.. They got home late and my uncle was drunk, and stumbled to their room, which happened to be right above me upstairs!! I figured they both went to bed , so I put the nudie movie I wasn't supposed to be watching back on, pulled my shorts off as my dick got harder I began to jerk off !! I was stroking my erection at a good pace, a few mins from cumming!!! All the sudden the basement light comes on reveling me naked hold my stiff cock!!! I stood up and got behind the sofa to cover me from the waist down... Much to my delighted surprise my aunt came down the stairs , and she wasn't wearing a bra but was in a sexy black pair of panties!! She noticed me like a sore thumb and says Ronnie what are you doing awake still? I muttered uuummm , uugh .. That's when she noticed a nudie on TV looked back at me and I came out from standing behind the couch to reveal my raging hard on,, uuugh aunt Linda I was masturbating!! Oh my Ronnie, uummm you can go in the bathroom and finish if you need to!!! I glanced up at her face away from her beautious 40DD's as I grasp my cock and said, Auntie Linda you have really nice big breast!!! Oh Ronnie I forgot I was topless, it's OK auntie, you can still see my boner !!! Ronnie we aren't supposed to see each other naked your my nephew, and your my aunt with huge breasts, that I want to feel!! Omg Ronnie!!! Alright feel my breasts and finish masturbating !! Yesss thanx auntie!!! I grouped her breasts, and even sucked on her nipples a moment....Alright Ronnie I think you have had enough now!! I noticed she was pawing at her vagina through her panties, I asked does your vagina hurt Linda?? Ahh um nnnoo no I think I spilt on my self my panties are damp!!! Oh OK, auntie!! Knowing very well she was aroused I asked um aunt Linda will you stroke me a lil my arm is sore? Jesus Ronnie this is naughty, i won't ever do any of this for you again!! UNDERSTOOD!!! MHHMMM OK.. not even 2 mins with her stroking my cock I was close to cumming! Mmmm yes I like that Linda!!! I didn't even tell her I was close to blowing cum on her , and right as I began to cum , I said Linda I gonna ejaculate now!!! She opened her mouth and I blasted her throat with jizz! Ooh damn that was awesome auntie thanx so much for helping me ejaculate... you can't ever tell anyone Ronnie!! Yes ma'am I won't!! As she got up off her knees I gave her a hug and grouped her breasts once more, before I reached for her groin and slid my hand over her vagina soaked panties, looked her in the eyes and whispered auntie your vagina made your panties wet!! Ever since that night I get jerked off for 2weeks every year on fishing opener, morning, noon, n night, I finger her pussy and give her a rimjob to orgasm and that's as far as she allows it to go...

When I was 16 I was watching my nephews, while my aunt and uncle went out for dinner.. They got home...