I have a diary of all my appointments and events but after the news a few weeks ago about more skin cancer I just lost all focus on what was going on around me. forgot appointments and I go to see a skin cancer doctor a lot and I knew something was wrong for a long time. the gyno said the vaginal itch is definately not in my imagination. its embarasing and I just feel more persecuted and abused really. I did enough vaginal cutting on my self as self punishment as a child for the sexual abuse- this is just adding to the hurt and feelings of always being punished that somehow it was all my fault- but a therapist today told me its normal to go through this upset and fear. I have to do what ever treatment I can to heal and get better. I hate neddles I am scared of having to go through vaginal reconstructive surgery due to skin cancer and abnormal cells that showed up and I am just praying that it won't be so bad as all that or have to go that far. - what did I ever do to deserve all this? as a child of 4? what little girl of 4 looks for this abuse and neglect and harshness because I never did. I don't understand why I have never been really loved how I wanted to be loved. I wanted children and marriage so badly. I was just afraid to make a move fear of being attacked and bashed. I long to have a normal healthy sex life and love life, a love of my own! I don't understand what god does this to children? its making me question my faith and not that I could turn to satanism, I never could, even I used to laugh at some of those comedy things and other times I would cry because they actually werent funny for the real victims of it.

I dress up at the rennaisance faire and get seriously into rennie culture, and have done since I was a little kid. What really pisses me off is when people say "Oh, you're a cosplayer?" No! I'm not a fucking cosplayer!! I love costume because it helps create an immersive environment, where a big group of people all become part of a whole. As a socially awkward person, I can throw on some garb, get to thee faire, and drink, dance, chat, mingle with other rennies without social anxiety. It's a fellowship - a group hug - and it's a feeling of total camaraderie. Cosplayers, on the other hand, are mostly narcissists. They do whatever they can to stand out in a crowd because they think they're better than everyone else. They take selfies like it's going out of style. They charge money for others to hang out with them. They want to be treated like gods. I've also been around cosplayers, and 99% of them are backstabbing bitches who talk about each other in the worst ways, trying to one-up each other constantly. They're all about self-promotion and conceit. So please don't call rennies cosplayers. We're not. Just because cosplayers sometimes show up at the faire doesn't mean they "get it."

I dress up at the rennaisance faire and get seriously into rennie culture, and have done since I was...

Politics, society, pop culture and the human condition: I am done! I hear about certain ethnic persu...

i like trump and i am a woman and think all these abuse stories about trump are lies. he is a great ...