i hate how fat i feel, the messy grotty house, the whining cats, I love the cats but just whines and whines for food non stop. its like being bombarded everywhere, messy junk everywhere I want to cry, i never go down stairs so I wont cry and see the mess there. no one will help me at all for the last 15 years i have literally been tortured and neighbors trying to burn our house with pickets and my fathers abusive drinking yelling my mothers constant bullying. why are they doing this to me? why don't any one care about me? why is it no one has ever cared about me? why was my sisters male friends constantly wanting to dominate and go out with me and I hated them. I mean I absolutely hated them. they sickened me. I have a degree i have diplomas and still couldn't find work. i hate you for your abuse on me db i really do you didn't do what i asked you do. you wrecked things. i wanted them better and you made them worse.