I have never been a liked or loved person. there is nothing loveable about me even when I was thin and young no one ever liked me to the standards I was expecting and that hurt me and made me feel like why is everyone else getting thejobs and guys? why are fat slobby dogs who are rude get love and I am too nice to even matter? why? how much of a murdering mongrel do I have to be to be good enough for a job or man?