my older sister was always calling me fat and ugly and unworthy since the day I was born. she won't allow our family to be a family that I can share in around her, its only her family when she is alone with her parents when she can bare them, and I am allowed to be with my parents, but she won't let me find love with any man, or to be liked as a child by friends or never liked me being liked by other relatives or even the avon lady etc , its something I don't understand. she has been screaming at me for over 30 years or more that she hates me , as the years go on she has got worse. I actually no longer love her how I used to, I no longer even try to fit in with her. I work with therapists to make me believe I am worthy of love and friends and qualities that I am allowed to have. my sister didn't want me having a nice looking husband and pushed me to every gross bald old fat weirdo in my teen and twenties etc, and I am desperately wanting to feel worthy of white intelligent attractive man I really can love and not the men my sister chose for me and would bully me to go out with. Can she handle seeing me get married as much as she has been or have a baby. she says she is the most intellegent person with her computer course and the rest of us are dumb compared to her because she graduated and the rest of us didn't and dropped out.