i am sick of living in this squaller hovel dump hole from hell. it used to be a nice house, then I met joyce, before her and while I was seeing her our house was lovely clean all the time, I cleaned it senselessly. we had shit furniture but I cleaned it and then I would go looking for friends and a boyfriend same old pattern, get bashed and give up and go back to study or work and same old patterns keep emerging. like no homeless person dumps themselves at our house to live. I could really do with some young homeless bloke to move in here and clean up this for his rent and for the company and someone to talk to. if he had a car it would be all the better. if he was nice looking would be better still. I was nice looking once and I was forced to go out and mix with lowlife scum, educating the grunts the army rejected into style and eating dinner with them when I hated them so why can't someone do that for me? I had to put up with that bloody annoying keith and russel and wayne and peter and all my sisters retards. no wonder her husband david found those tards too much to cope with, they were always hanging around them. that spastic fat eliza she was a real spaz, and alison thick as two fucking bricks slammed together. dopped out.

benefits of having no friends, you don't have to stress out buying birthday presents for friends who don't like what you give them. you can spend it on you and have less stress with their shit on you and guilt over if its not good enough, save a money or two and stress, you don't have to go if your with a partner or friend you have to give in or share what you don't want to and you can leave when you want or don't go if your friendless and without a partner. have no fear and no friends, quality time is more important to put to yourself on a holiday or learn about yourself with time and workshop, less effort to spent it on yourself. and a pet is a better friend then any human, also no competition, your friends will always put you down for not being just like them or not having a job or with a guy or doing whatever, self confidence goes down cuz you will compare yourself to others otherwise why do you copy treads or look to be accepted by a parnters friends and family, who is the winner, you don't have to drink or eat out or wear crap you don't want to. they will sponge off you and use your car, and things and want you to help them shift or look after the baby or pet or do work for them and, their gonna be so selfish thinking you should be like them. no dread family weirdo family days and not even meal eat with others yuk its better on your own. you don't have to share. just make up a friend rather then an asshole as a friend. I have imaginary invisble friend who does everything right and pretend partner and he does everything right. arguments with friends are bad and you don't want to go through all that shit but your pretend friends won't hurt you. your friends or partner will die anyway. no friends won't make you cool or better, I am cool and one of the beautifully busy people and I don't need anyone to tell me all that or their crap they can go keep in their toilet. cuz friends they will steal your job or man and house or your project and lie about you cuz they are just like that. and if your not like that then you really deserve a good friend. but how your gonna buy them all? friends with benefits is a new meaning it means not just sex but friends who are only worth being friends with to get you places and be useful to walk over to get somewhere and you don't want that just like I don't want that. so have no friends. be wise by yourself a nice xmas gift and feel great alone and make a new years resolution to quit all friends cuz there is no human being without problems and their like quiting smoking all friends are super toxic. there is no getting away from the toxic levels of lows you will feel around friends and partners who slip up and let you down. 2018 the year of living vary vicariously and victimless!

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