I fucked married women, single women, little girls, young boys and I

I fucked married women, single women, little girls, young boys and I even fucked a pigeon once and it died bleeding but yesterday was the first time that I fuck an old lady in her seventies and she enjoyed it, but i was disgusted, I only did it for money which I need it badly to buy a new computer and she offered me that money by fucking her I feel sick whenever I remember last night's encounter. What makes me really pissed off is that she told me to come regularly and she will give me more money I hate it, but I need to buy a new car, and I 'm wondering if there is a way which keeps me sedated or unawake when I fuck this old woman, so i will not be disgusted anymore.
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we cheated on each other so much and regret is a vile creature. Never leave any regrets in your life. They eat you alive over time. twenty years ago I was 18 and met a guy and we got married after dating 4 months. But he was cheater and liar. I left him soon after we got married. But I have regretted it ever since but he was he is and I knew I deserved better. Its been years and I still could never love him after he had an affair with my sister and a few of her friends and I got photos of their gang bang sent to my facebook page I felt a complete fool infront of all our friends later. But before I left him I messed my life up bad with gambling and my job ment I had to do fifo stays before it was the in thing to do. I did a lot of dumb things during my pregnancies that would be toxic to any relationship. He told me he still loved me last year but I turned him down because he was drunk and back to his old tricks doing porn in vans that made me sick, number 1 he had a too short a dick that was boring to me, number 2 he lazy and never bothered to improve himself or our mix of friends other then the loosers at the pub and soccor clubs. My mistakes would ruin his life? but then his would sure ruin mine. I want him to be snappy even its w/o me. I have a current bf but in my heart, I don't love him. He knows this though, he tries to help me move forward and has a stable job which makes me more stable and I don't see the kids anyway now they are at boarding school which was the best thing no matter how much I resisted it and we argued over custody but boarding school won out and worked out best now we only see them alternate holidays. I try to get over my ex husband cheating me but I can't. Its a real contradiction that we fouled on each other. Now all that is left is regret and it is destroying my sanity but I have a new life and chance. and no more kids.

we cheated on each other so much and regret is a vile creature. Never leave any regrets in your life...