I have really enjoy my time with yard, but I think I scared him away from work. falalalaa!

i don't like the way i am being treated. i just found out other psychiatrists see child abuse victims more then my psychiatrist allows me to see him. he spends more time looking through his letters when i go for my appointment and his speciality is war veterans which is not my issue, i have been told to find a new psychiatrist by a few people who feel i am not being treated correctly. and my doctor rarely gives me ideas of how to cope in situations or deal with issues that are relevent to my age. he treats me as if i am male and his age and I am starting to dislike this whole picture now. i feel i have been once again pushed in the wrong direction. and i am sick of this game. its getting boring long ago. another company said I deserve better treatment.

i don't like the way i am being treated. i just found out other psychiatrists see child abuse victim...

I've never met my father and from what my mum told me he was really mean. I am normally a nice girl, I'm shy and a bit anti social (though it was worse when I was younger) in the sense that I prefer hanging out by myself and staying at home than going outside or being with anyone else. But sometimes I feel like being mean. I do restrain it because I know I'll get in trouble and considering my reputation at school if I lose my friends then I'll suffer (when we have to work in pairs), it's already at a point that they only choose me if none of their other friends are there (It's my fault, I only talk to them that much in class anyway) so if I do something mean to them they'll all start ignoring me. I think I got that mean streak from my father because even before I knew about him I felt like this. Every time one of my friends has a secret, I wanna know, which is natural but when I do I just feel like telling everyone or a specific person if it's a crush or similar. I did this once before where my friend told me she liked a guy and I told this girl in Maths and the guy also sat on our table so he heard it. He thought it was a joke and after that he knew she wasn't joking. My friend found out but forgave me and said if I ever do it again she hate me. A part of me was happy she gave me another chance because I already ruined it for her by the guy knowing (and it not being a joke like he thought) and I felt sick at having those thoughts. I used to do it a lot in primary school and I loved it because even though I got told off I was never seriously reprimanded by my mum. I hate it now because I can't get away with any of that, those were my thoughts at the start of secondary school. Believe me, it's not something that I proud of. It's like those shows where there's the angel and the devil. When I get like this I take pleasure in seeing the people close to me suffer, my friends. Never my family. It's wrong and I know I should do therapy or something but my mum would never take me seriously as I didn't grow up influenced by my father and I don't want to lose this part of me. I like it. And that's what scares me the most.

I've never met my father and from what my mum told me he was really mean. I am normally a nice girl,...

Why is it that EVERY woman on the planet is competing with every other one? There is no point in it in the first place! After you get married, there is certainly no point in it. More men have gone on to have affairs, lose interest or something else that finally leads to divorce aftrer the constant badgering of "Why are you looking at her?", "What are you looking at, do you want to fuck her?", "Will you still love me if I get fat?" (What, you asking permission to look like shit?!?!?!?), "All men are pigs." and on and on and on.... Men start wars to get away from badgering wives. Its much easier to live in a hellhole and kill everyday than it is to be nice to some badgering bitch who thinks everyne is out to get her. Message for women: We are too tired from work to give a shit. The men claiming to be banging everyone are gay...you didn't figure that one out yet? Now get the fuck out of the garage and stay out!

Why is it that EVERY woman on the planet is competing with every other one? There is no point in it ...