You look at me from the outside and it seems like I am doing alright, put together, professionally stable and in control. But the truth is - I am overwhelmed. It's not the same as depression, and it's not all sadness. More of an overall emptiness with no clue how to move forward and still be the grown up with grown up responsibilities. My children are grown, but are still in need of me being a stable force - and since I am their only parent, it falls to me. I am alone in the world, surrounded by family in name only - without support or backups. I feel so much in limbo and wish I could find a trustworthy adult, adultier than me who can help me figure out where to go, or how to move forward. And, your wife called to tell me you passed away. And I'm not sure how to feel, or if I feel anything. I'm not sure it WAS anything.