no one asked you into the story der head. you are not welcome. fuck off.

I hate being a mom I f****** hate being a mom. I love my child with all my heart but I wasn't ready for this. The person I had the baby with said he'd be there every step of the way and now I'm stuck doing this alone. I can't pee alone, eat, sleep, bathe f****** none of that. I can't go anywhere and I'm a f****** stay at home mom because my child's father wasn't going to take off work to watch her and no one else could and I didn't have the money to put her in daycare. I'm starting to hate my child's father. We don't even f****** live together because he would rather be a roommate with his friend than to share responsibility of having this child. He thinks because he brings diapers every now and again that he's a "parent". He drops by and leaves. He gets a break and some freedom. I'm here 24/7. It drives me crazy because I have no outlet. Before I was a parent I was just graduating from college and on my own. I don't regret my child but I regret who I had it with and the time period I did. I would've had her when I was a lot older and more stable. I'm living with my mother with no car, no job and I'm f****** 23. I got postpartum depression after I had my baby and they immediately put me on antidepressants that do nothing. I picture myself just running away in the middle of the night and leaving everything all behind but my child needs a mother. She's almost a year old and time can't go fast enough. I just want her to grow up already. The baby phase has been nothing but h***. She came out a preemie and had bad colic and could barely eat. She didn't sleep and still doesn't now. Her father thinks he has it so f****** hard just working at Walmart for a couple hours and coming home. The difference with us is I don't get a break. I have to do this everyday nonstop with ZERO help. I have emotional break downs constantly and just want to end it all. I feel like a failure and I did my life all wrong. I'm so disappointed in myself and I cry everyday about it. I feel so guilty because when I first found out I was pregnant by my child's father I immediately wanted an abortion or go for adoption because he wasn't responsible at all. I still think about it now and always wonder,"What if?" I love my child and I'm happy she is here but I feel like I'm really drowning. I always wonder did I miss out on my life having my child so early. The rest of my friends are living it up and I'm home being a mom....alone.

I hate being a mom I f****** hate being a mom. I love my child with all my heart but I wasn't ready ...

hmm, men and bitches fake show pony repertoire like the fake ass charm of the politican and his fake play up to kids all part of the fake game he plays like they all do too, its already has a new bimbo blonde squeeze, my former boss would called her a complete useless bimbet. it means- a stock of plays, dances, or items that a company or a performer knows or is prepared to perform. synonyms: collection, stock, range, repertory the whole body of items which are regularly performed.a stock of skills or types of behavior that a person habitually uses. it would be nice to meet a man who has genuine charm and class and not a asshole side and who can actually put words right. like words do mostly come easy to me, sometimes not and so I try to give men the benefit of the doubt that maybe they really can't express how they really feel about a woman to a woman due their lack of maturity and their bold male bravado they go on with but its never charming. jordan was the same, so was rick and so was dr and its strange. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLGcAo5i7H8&list=RDqLGcAo5i7H8&start_radio=1 i mean why do they bother to flirt to let you down all the time since I was a child men did this to me. other men in my teens that i liked. all the men i hated wouldn't get the hint to fuck off quickly like Russel and peter, ken and Keith and Wayne. i never liked them, never loved them. they had no charm and i didn't care that they had no charm but it hurts when the ones you like have no charm and sweet care. rick used to do some very seductive sweet things no man has ever done to me ever. same with jordan and dr and mr politician. why do men i like do that? thanks for ruining my life and stopping me from having the love, money and education graduation and house and marriage etc. just thanks a lot. so sick of it and i have still never owned a credit card in my life and i am near 50. what does that tell you about the world?

hmm, men and bitches fake show pony repertoire like the fake ass charm of the politican and his fake...

hmm, men and bitches fake show pony repertoire \\it means- a stock of plays, dances, or items that a company or a performer knows or is prepared to perform. synonyms: collection, stock, range, repertory the whole body of items which are regularly performed.a stock of skills or types of behavior that a person habitually uses. it would be nice to meet a man who has genuine charm and class and not a asshole side and who can actually put words right. like words do mostly come easy to me, sometimes not and so I try to give men the benefit of the doubt that maybe they really can't express how they really feel about a woman to a woman due their lack of maturity and their bold male bravdo they go on with but its never charming. jordon was the same, so was rick and so was dr and its strange. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLGcAo5i7H8&list=RDqLGcAo5i7H8&start_radio=1 i mean why do they bother to flirt to let you down all the time since I was a child men did this to me. other men in my teens that i liked. all the men i hated wouldn't get the hint to fuck off quickly like russel and ken and keith and wayne, peter etc. i never liked them, never loved them. they had no charm and i didn't care that they had no charm but it hurts when the ones you like have no charm and sweet care. rick used to do some very seductive sweet things no man has ever done to me ever. same with jordan and dr and politician or cop. why do men i like do that?

hmm, men and bitches fake show pony repertoire \\it means- a stock of plays, dances, or items that...