I feel so worthless. Everyday I feel like I'm not doing anything right. Everything I do bothers me. I can honestly say I'm not truly happy, and I dont know what to do. I have a great boyfriend who I know really loves me, and I love him. By everytime I'm alone my thoughts go wild. I feel like I'm not good enough, for anything. This has been going on for a while and I just want it to STOP! self hate self hate self hate.

Hate

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being around nick cutting crew/ bugsy as a kid was like being around adam lambert and for all I care milo p can put the kirk/ coke can up his ass too or in mouth so long as the bastards are not need me. my godparents were not even catholic they were nutters old and useless rich scum!! while your at it. look at this fool its so "hames reyne hammerhead, Catholics take food from your mouth, your the like the devil in hell, hanging out with the nicest awful people in Catholics. silken slip of catholic evil" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMmBwCSk6sw&list=PLL8ssTVkmeoxdXqTkdRhfYlGu-FPI0bKa or is it george micheal wham all she wants" oh god help us.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7G8gTAjKXg who is this stupid leader of the pack? someone please send him back. enjoy the fame cuz it will cost you! try to wipe the wool across the worlds eyes, well I won't be. sorry if I am laughing at you. milo kerigan sort of, but my mum didn't like the catholic church when they allowed athethests who had no faith to be godparents, i think the church should make godparents to answer to a counselling to find out why they want to be a godparent and their faith and stop making fools of kids for richies ego. i have had enough of your abuses on me. the sexual abuse, the throwing things around, the sexual degridations and everything. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMo8JuPPb0M what they did to my sister and putting us in hospital and making us ill and expecting us to live like gay nuns? self torturing , not fucking normal.

being around nick cutting crew/ bugsy as a kid was like being around adam lambert and for all I care...

Pride Abuse Hate

Lifeline5022End conversation Info at 22:08, Nov 27: Please wait for a Crisis Supporter to respond. You are number 4 in the queue. Info at 22:10, Nov 27: All Crisis Supporters are currently assisting others. Thanks for your patience. A Crisis Supporter will be with you shortly. You are currently 3 in the queue. The current average wait time is 8 minutes and 35 seconds. If you would like to view the FAQ please click on this link (opens in a new tab) Info at 22:12, Nov 27: All Crisis Supporters are currently assisting others. Thanks for your patience. A Crisis Supporter will be with you shortly. You are currently 2 in the queue. The current average wait time is 5 minutes and 23 seconds. If you would like to view the FAQ please click on this link (opens in a new tab) Info at 22:14, Nov 27: All Crisis Supporters are currently assisting others. Thanks for your patience. A Crisis Supporter will be with you shortly. You are currently 2 in the queue. The current average wait time is 5 minutes and 23 seconds. If you would like to view the FAQ please click on this link (opens in a new tab) Info at 22:16, Nov 27: All Crisis Supporters are currently assisting others. Thanks for your patience. A Crisis Supporter will be with you shortly. You are currently 2 in the queue. The current average wait time is 5 minutes and 23 seconds. If you would like to view the FAQ please click on this link (opens in a new tab) Info at 22:18, Nov 27: All Crisis Supporters are currently assisting others. Thanks for your patience. A Crisis Supporter will be with you shortly. You are currently 1 in the queue. The current average wait time is 3 minutes and 4 seconds. If you would like to view the FAQ please click on this link (opens in a new tab) Info at 22:20, Nov 27: All Crisis Supporters are currently assisting others. Thanks for your patience. A Crisis Supporter will be with you shortly. You are currently 1 in the queue. The current average wait time is 3 minutes and 4 seconds. If you would like to view the FAQ please click on this link (opens in a new tab) Info at 22:21, Nov 27: You are now chatting with Lifeline. Info at 22:28, Nov 27: There is a problem connecting with Lifeline1073. Please wait while your chat is transferred to another agent. Info at 22:28, Nov 27: You are now chatting with Lifeline. Lifeline5022 at 22:29, Nov 27: Welcome to Lifeline's Crisis Support Chat service. What has been going on for you this evening? charly hort at 22:31, Nov 27: not well. I am very worried over my health and my cats health. I am worried I have spread a std or fungal / virus combination to my family in the wash with my illness and clothing and touching other things. and the cat touching me and smelling my clothing. its all my fault. I know this will kill him and kill me. we dead! charly hort at 22:31, Nov 27: i will kill myself and others if my cat dies. enough is enough. charly hort at 22:32, Nov 27: this is all because a stupid doctor was not treating my rash properly Lifeline5022 at 22:32, Nov 27: I can hear you feel frustrated and also scared that you may cause illness to other people and your cat charly hort at 22:33, Nov 27: yeh what's more is my gp was not treating it properly and not using the right cream and now i could have cancer. and hpv from their cross contamination lack of care. charly hort at 22:35, Nov 27: all because I won't love a tard old fart theordumb and all because i can't appreciate being raped by a spastic. charly hort at 22:36, Nov 27: someone has been trying to kill me, I want to dob in a doctor who has not been treating me properly. Dr Dale Lee and I am sick of this racial abuse just cuz I am not asian doesn't mean I don't deserve quality treatment and respect Lifeline5022 at 22:36, Nov 27: I can hear you feel worried and frustrated charly hort at 22:38, Nov 27: my cat could die now. and luckily none of the other cats i have or my family have picked up the virus or fungus infection I have on their face or arms when I hug them but it has to be me spreading the germs due to a doctor not doing his job properly. Lifeline5022 at 22:39, Nov 27: Would it help for you to take the cat for a check up at the vet? charly hort at 22:39, Nov 27: i could have hiv aids and clamidia and god only knows what and herpes and shingles and small pox or some virus that has not been found yet. charly hort at 22:40, Nov 27: i tried to take him today but the stupid receptionist said that the vet had no free appts til wednesday and he has to see a vet tomorrow or I will take him to another vet who will act quickly and do something or the cat will end up with his nose falling off and its rotting off Lifeline5022 at 22:41, Nov 27: I can hear you have health concerns, and you're worried about other people too charly hort at 22:41, Nov 27: he won't take medicines and he will have to have a needle and go to a cat dermitologist charly hort at 22:41, Nov 27: yeh its the money honey. the money. charly hort at 22:43, Nov 27: i wish had all the money in the world to make everyone happy but no one is making me feel loved and happy. just fat and ugly and worried. it aint any fun and it aint happy for me, if i am fat and stressed out and my pets sick. and doctors not doing their jobs right. they want me and all pensioners to diie soon. they are trying to kill us all off. Lifeline5022 at 22:43, Nov 27: I'm here to listen and support you tonight. Apart from the things you've told me about, what support would be helpful? charly hort at 22:44, Nov 27: i need my rights heard and met. I have no legal help as a woman I am spit scum. and I have a spastic father who is drunk all the time and got dementia and thinks he is an academic. its just pathetic from this spastic who drinks and smoked his family to death. Lifeline5022 at 22:45, Nov 27: It sounds like you don't trust anyone...that they've been lying to you charly hort at 22:45, Nov 27: my enemies are trying to harm me. Lifeline5022 at 22:45, Nov 27: enemies....? charly hort at 22:46, Nov 27: i beleive we are being socially engineered and a lot of people on pensions are just on a waiting list like a nazi list to be bumped off. they want us to die. Lifeline5022 at 22:47, Nov 27: You've talked about death and suicide. Do you plan to end your life tonight? charly hort at 22:47, Nov 27: right now i have rash all over my arms and the face one healed up with a antibiotic ointment and the arms are bad at the moment charly hort at 22:49, Nov 27: no i don't know when, if some vet doesn't help tomorrow and do some serious action i am going to attack someone. its time I killed someone , a person for putting me in such a black place. whoever made me this black I could kill them. the social engineering and abuse against white battered abused neglected women. charly hort at 22:50, Nov 27: i don't like any of the men i have been introduced to so far and the ones I like go off to other places. and I am sick of old farts sexually harassing me. Lifeline5022 at 22:52, Nov 27: It sounds like you feel you're being victimised by people in authority charly hort at 22:52, Nov 27: yeh and from low lifes as well Lifeline5022 at 22:54, Nov 27: What can you do to protect yourself from the people who are trying to hurt you? charly hort at 22:56, Nov 27: i don't feel there is. they just attack me when they want to using witchcraft and getting people to attack me, or abuse me, they pay people to abuse me. or they just have like isis connections and spread viruses to kill off groups of people who are shall we say in the way. like princess diana and others. they kill them when they don't shut up and just quietly go away. Lifeline5022 at 22:56, Nov 27: I can hear this is making you feel insecure and scared charly hort at 22:56, Nov 27: i have had viruses spread on me since a baby. I had whooping cough that were spread by coca-cola. the bastards tried to kill me. charly hort at 22:57, Nov 27: they are big companies I don't think you know who your dealing with how poweful these terrorist groups are . charly hort at 22:58, Nov 27: yeh I do feel unsafe. I admit it was my idea to use a jet plane to bomb a building i just didn't think anyone would actually use the idea for sept 11 world towers. charly hort at 22:59, Nov 27: to these people its just a game like a computer game. spreading viruses and causing accidents which are no accidents. these people know what they are doing. they steal creative works and take money from people and have no morals at all. Lifeline5022 at 23:00, Nov 27: What helps you to cope with so much fear and dread about the world and the people in it? charly hort at 23:02, Nov 27: * shrug* just a constant outwitting game of survival. they even rape people and get men to molest kids. so you have no idea how these people are so evil. its just a game joke to them. they have no human heart no care for who they hurt. charly hort at 23:02, Nov 27: the catholic church are invovled too. its all about powerplay. charly hort at 23:03, Nov 27: its gonna get worse yet with terrorism attacks. I am sick of this abuse but I have to protect myself and pets too. Lifeline5022 at 23:03, Nov 27: What can you do tonight that will help you to relax and hopefull get some good rest? charly hort at 23:06, Nov 27: I will be checking on my cat periodically all night so i know he is breathing i don't want him to die, if he dies i hope he dies at home and with me holding him. but i will be calling a vet again in the morning and make them do what i want or take him to another vet. and they will lose my business if they don't sharpen up their act. sometimes I wish all my pets would just all die and I die quick so there is less stress and some peace at last . i want to just go to a coffin and grave and be left alone. charly hort at 23:06, Nov 27: i can't take it anymore. i hope everyone gets this too. i hope they get viruses and know how it feels Lifeline5022 at 23:06, Nov 27: I can hear you have to live constantly with anxiety. I can send you a link to a service you may find helpful Lifeline5022 at 23:06, Nov 27: Mental Health Online (Swinburne) - https://www.mentalhealthonline.org.au/ - Mental Health Online is an internet-based treatment clinic for people with anxiety problems. - Mental Health Online offers a comprehensive online mental health service providing information, assessment, online diagnosis and treatment programs ("eTherapy") https://www.mentalhealthonline.org.au/ charly hort at 23:06, Nov 27: I could have been contaiminated with hiv aids as a child with other mothers germy gutter breast milk, once again see their game of killing off groups. can't you see ? I can see witchcraft. if you can't your spastic.

Lifeline5022End conversation Info at 22:08, Nov 27: Please wait for a Crisis Supporter to respond. Y...

Abuse Hate

What to do...? Ever since my ex blew up last Halloween, I've been trying to keep my distance from her. Every time after that night when we had s, I made sure that I got it out of my system so I wouldn't have to go back to her again. Each time I'd be more rough than before, just to make sure I 'punished' her, because I knew she'd be hurting for days after. The last time we had s, it was awesome and lasted like an eternity, but I wanted to make sure I didn't have to come back again and I could just say no when she calls late at night. She called me last Friday, wanting to hook up this week. We haven't seen each other in months. I know she still has a banging body and hadn't seen or been with anyone since our last time. It's a trap. I know it. Please don't call...please don't call......

What to do...? Ever since my ex blew up last Halloween, I've been trying to keep my distance from h...

Hate Blasphemy

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