I hate that call the midwife tv show. what a bucket of poop!

I hate knots.

I hate knots.

revenge is bs. I never knew why louise was out to revenge me. I did nothing wrong to her. the girl was spoilt and selfish and nuts. her and bugsy were narcissistic freaks. if they stopped going through diaries and butting in where they are not welcome that would help a lot. all my relatives have no concept of boundaries, that is why I want nothing to do with them and mum and dad feel the same way, they don't want to know my brother and I don't want to know them. I don't want anything from any of my relatives. my family is the immediate family in the house that is it. we too old to change. we don't want to mix with any of them ever again. I just don't want to see cousins and people who left me behind. they are behind me for a reason.! they mean nothing to me or mum or dad. my parents have no feelings for my brother and his kids at all. I told aaron don't call me or talk to me again. and that is how it has to be. my older sister has been abusing me violently everytime she gets married or divorced and she takes everything anyone does out on me since the day I was born. I don't have to forgive or love. I don't love my older sister anymore and she has abused me, dad and mum too much. she takes everything out on us and my doctors support me on this.

revenge is bs. I never knew why louise was out to revenge me. I did nothing wrong to her. the girl w...

some days I used to think "well if I die today I die, so long as I feed my cats" after the car accident and different times I was sick with heart problems and they always paint things over at the cardiologist as "its all great so why aren't you smiling?" you can't attack and abuse people for decades and give them an anti-depressant to smile when the abuse is always there, no releif from her abuse and so on, I won't expect anyone to love or care for me ever again. I don't want abusive people around me which is why I left those abusive violent churches that talk spew violence in biblical form also. i just don't want to be around idiots playing games anymore. I accept I will never marry or have children. I have wondered if I will have a short life a lot even in my twenties that was on my mind a lot. I knew it was just me, no one was ever gonna care about this ugly dog loser young thin pretty old or fat clever or dumb, I was always ment to be unloved. some people have all the fun and luck while others dont. I hated everything david bowie and his dirties did to me, those choirs. the church idiots, the doctors and dull evil ambulance wankers not even people. my cats shit is better then them.

some days I used to think "well if I die today I die, so long as I feed my cats" after the car accid...