i hated miranda the moment i met her. ugly red haired dog. ugly ugly!

currently the austrlain govt attitude appears to be they just people or women like me to sit locked away in a room without friends or care and left to masturbate all our lives with any form of romantic love and meaningul emotional committement and its just not good enough to be treated like this and for a country or state to say that its ok for churches and colleges and doctors and everywhere I go to be bullied as some sexual slave to someone I don't want to be with. this was the exact same thing that these freaks did to me as a little child where I was a sexual captive to this dirty old pedophile for over 10 years from the age of 4 or 5 and its just not on! my parents are not tolerating the bullying and abuse from rsl and military and doctors, I tell my parents everything, even when we argue I tell them everything that people are doing to me or what they are saying. somedays I will rehash and repeat stories and things joyce and katy said to me over and over and over at my mother and father and other people trying to resolve it and I still can't in my head until I have the life I wanted back years ago I think I will continue rehashing and talking about it til its delt with and I am allowed some fight back and someone to listen to me and support my needs and my feelings in all this. because this is hate crime. that is what it is. its ritualised satanic occult on-going repetitive hate places I go so you learn not to trust. having a stalker watching every page i am on what online courses I do, where I shop or whatever is just an invasion of privacy and dirty ! its not helping me. its not making me feel love for people and infact its doing the exact oppposite where I am starting to hate and mistrust everyone and I could look at a man and not even feel love or a crush on him because I hear those things joyce and katy and rick and ken and the filipenos and my sister and so on, and other people said to me all over a new guys face now.

currently the austrlain govt attitude appears to be they just people or women like me to sit locked ...

part of terrets sydrome is doing repeative things like telling the same stories over and over, or flinches and nervous twitches or uncontrolablly barking like a dog, I was doing that for a while and had to just stop going to family gatherings because I couldn't eat infront of them without shaking and getting nervous twitches and uncontrollable or just out of the blue barking like a dog or making rooster and car break noises because their are no words left in you to say because no one around you is making any sense when they should but noises of pain. some poeple uncontrolably swear a lot or have other deficeits, I feel I am lucky that some of my nervous twitches did stop after I seen a specialist years ago but I avoid situation where I think it will set off, like I will not talk about sex around circles, I avoid classes that set out in circles where everyone can look at you. I often have little cues I do to calm myself or let my mum know, I don't seem to have the same trouble with public speaking as I did for over 35 years of my life even when doing drama at school or reading I was trembling inside, but once I went through a few bad health problems I just became less and less afraid of public speaking and quite like it now so long if I am talking about something I know. my fears seem to be things like going for pap smears and blood tests or needles (if I do it myself I can control the pain better) and hospitals still, I admit I am terrified of going on a cruise and flying is ok but it sometimes is a bit fearful for me. I have never liked water and I still can't put my head under water or even wet my ears without fear of ear infection trauma, I seem to think every woman is out to steal any man I like from me due to katey abusing me. I have no real sexual confidence in myself and I became sexually shut down from all the pedo abuse done on me as a child. I find sexual situations difficult but want a romantic love in my life and I feel that if I did have that and a child it would ease my anger and frustration and pains a lot, to just have a kitchen of my own and a real true friend. I don't trust a lot of therapist and doctors anymore. and I fear hospital still and I find it hard even looking at the building and that fear of death I went through and questioning well when is the big bang gonna happen in my brain or heart? no one ever liked me much because i was always so ugly! and unworthy unlike everyone else around me.

part of terrets sydrome is doing repeative things like telling the same stories over and over, or fl...

one nurse at the local hosptial attacked me verbally about the population growth in the area as if it was my fault, I mean I haven't been given the priveledges that nurse has to have work or breed she was a maarried whore with kids, I have never been married and don't have kids. another nurse accused me of wanting to look in the triage examination room at other patients being examined which was rubbish why would I want to look at fat ugly old creepy hulkenstein sick fuckers when I hate hospitals anyway and I was more concerned about myself not others. then one nurse told me to get off the property and not come back and accused me of being rude and I didn't do anything wrong. this also happened at wello pt one misfit tried a stunt on me accusing me of being rude just because I asked when will the doctor see me because he was over an hour late. and told her I am not being rude to you I simply asked a polite question. she was trying a game on me to try to stir me up I could tell her gaming plan! and then one doctor at one of the hospitals said stupid things at me like look around and behind as you walk out the doors??? this was weird. another doctor got verbally attacking at me over medications that were causing problems and my mum was with me and she was just as insulted as I was - the ambulance told me to "get a new hobby" as if being sick and needing help was a choice? none of this made normal common sense its just hate crime and bullying and discrimination! doctors and medical staff who are "hate crime operants"... and it nothing justifies this and worse things that they were doing to me!

one nurse at the local hosptial attacked me verbally about the population growth in the area as if i...