Last night my husband my husband came late and was completely

Last night my husband my husband came late and was completely drunk, went to bed and slept naked after he took off his clothes, as usual I came to the bedroom later, and while collecting his clothes to put them in a laundry basket, I saw some lipstick stains in his underwear! I was really mad, this bastard was fooling around with god only knows kinda of whores!! I wanted to punish him, to make him suffer, so I brought some "glass wool", you know, the kind that used for A/C insulation, and sprayed some on his pubes while he was asleep, i even sprayed some on hid balls and between his thighs, and i was even thinking to put some up his ass too, but i couldn't move him to his back side, but I sprayed some on the bed next to him :) hehehe, you can't visualize how strange he started acting in the morning, scratching his balls and pubes and ass he deserve this, and I don't feel guilty at all and I will even do it again, If i eve saw any traces of lipstick in his briefs again :(
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I am in my late 30s, married without kids. Around three months or so into my marriage, I fell in love with a co-worker. My husband was clueless, and so was my co-worker. I fell into a depression. I wanted him, not my husband. I felt that I made a very big mistake. Of marrying my husband. My appetite fell, I grew sickly and lost weight. I constantly daydreamed of being with my coworker. I hated his wife. I hated that she had him, while I was stuck in a rut of a marriage. I told my husband that I was just stressed with work. This continued on for two years. Until my co-worker and I were thrown into a project together. He was assigned to our off-shore office out of the country, and while there I began to maneuver my way into his life. I would stay up late to talk to him via skype and viber and mail. I would constantly check with him for work updates, but would also ask how he was and what was he doing. I also began to open up about how I was unhappy with my marriage. Then he told me how he wanted to play a sport, but the wife would not support him. I told him that it was his right to do what ever he wanted, that his wife is being bitchy about it. I volunteered to do things for him, brought him food, little things that I knew he would appreciate. I loved him, I was ready to do anything to get him. Little by little our communication grew. It helped that things were not good with his wife, and I would rejoice every time they would quarrel. I wanted all of him. I was amazed about how I felt about him, our connection. I loved him, and he told me he loved me too. I craved everything about him. In the meantime, I told my husband that I did not love him anymore. He asked me if there was someone else, but I said no. Then early this year, his wife found out. She called me that same day to tell me foul things. I told him that his wife was telling me all those bad things, but he didn't respond. He emailed me later on to say that he loved his wife, and that I was a mistake. That it was never a relationship at the very beginning. Now I am so sad and confused. Did he really love me? Was it ever real? I love him so much it hurts every time I see him at the office. And it hurts more because I couldn't show it in any way, not with my husband constantly watching. I am so sad and depressed. I don't know how long will I be able to play along with pretending all is okay with my husband, when I do not love him anymore. I want him, but he has not communicated with me directly since the affair was found out. I tried to ask him to talk, but he wouldn't. I

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