drank til broke bar last night called in sick for work. wife left me for a rich cock head.

Im 20 years old today, Im divorced, unemployed, and living with my parents...I have no one to share this occasion with, I have wasted my life

Im 20 years old today, Im divorced, unemployed, and living with my parents...I have no one to share ...

Where do I even start? My life had been chaos ever since I left my husband, a year ago, but that's another story. My current boyfriend doesn't know I'm married, we've been living together for almost a year. He also doesn't know I've been sleeping with my boss. He also doesn't know I've been talking to someone I met online 2 years ago, or that I've been talking about getting back together with my husband. I know it's all bad and all selfish and all destructive. I know it stems from my lack of self-confidence and a need to feel wanted. None of it is fulfilling. I feel more empty now than I ever have. Sometimes I wonder what it will take for me to finally just be happy with myself? Until I can learn to love myself I know I will continue on with my unfulfilling search. On top of it all my anxiety is at a 10 and my bulimia is raging. Everything I'm confessing is everything I hate. But I obviously hate myself or else I wouldn't be engaging in any of it.

Where do I even start? My life had been chaos ever since I left my husband, a year ago, but that's a...

Today I woke up with a sudden realization that I have not acheved any of the things in life that I wanted to do. I wanted to be a cheerleader. I wanted to play sax in band. I wanted to have good grades. I wanted to go to State with my best friend. Instead of all of that, I didn't register into highschool until 10th grade, I didn't put any effort into getting in band because the director said it would be hard work, I always went to cheerleader try outs but never had the guts to participate, I let my friends do my homework and I almost failed the 11th grade, and instead of going to state I attended a 2 year college that's only a 15 minute drive from here. Really sad part is that I didn't finish my 1st year of college and I lied to everyone about it. Now I'm pregnant with a guy who has already cheated on me with a perfect redhead within our 2 year long relationship. I want a complete do over. I hate my life.

Today I woke up with a sudden realization that I have not acheved any of the things in life that I w...