part of me longs for a greater love then this old guy who means well but is not right for me.

I have had this experience a few times even without sex when I had a mastoid infection and I had to take a lot of anitibiotics and antifungal oral fluids, antihistomines and anti-infamatories to reduce swelling they affect the stomach and I didn't sleep for a straight 5 weeks lucky to get a hour or 30 mins sleep for 5 weeks most nights and I would have to pump up on water because of the sodium potassium pump problems and also serriton and they were doing dozens of ct scans and mri's on my brain and body i woke one night chocking and another night i had a minor stroke but I had a few of them before after being raped and also minor faints as a child after eating glass by accident some how it founds its way into the stuffed capsicums and I asked my doctor to test me for everything from stds, to hepatitis, tetanus, cancer and i even wanted another test for ms, mad cow, and ebola at some point and thyroid as well. i have already been told i have ms, its strange sensation with wet brain syndrome and I even wanted my doctor to test for encephalitis, I would have had a spinal fluid test if they had of asked even, I knew something was wrong with my brain and it was not just chemicals it was infection and then mri's showed a brain vein narrowing disorder and that i did at some point have a stroke. i wanted to be tested for brainstem diseases and huntingtons, tb of the ear and labyrinthitis, glandula fever, etc cuz i got a walking pneumonia at the same time, and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ga85sSRpWRQ, I couldn't drink milk for a good 7-8 months and everynight i had to play a Russian roulette with water and veins turning to burning wood and the dehydration and those stupid potassium tablets near killed me. I hardly ate, i couldn't eat salt even just some saline from nasal spray would dehydrate me and I had arguments with neurologists and was getting cranky at the bastards over brain scans. then all the cardio problems started up again. pathological levels of bp up and done and i knew something was wrong with the sodium/potasium pump with water in and out of cells. it took a good 3 years to be able to sweat it main parts of my body due to the kidney and spleen damage from allergic reactions to antibiotics that were the doctors fault cuz she would not listen and look at past records. i know the tablets that work best for me. I have been on very very strong duo and triple forte style antibiotics 2 or more at the same time after i was raped and even before that with liver fluke infection. I knew i had health issues that doctors were ignoring and i still know it.

I have had this experience a few times even without sex when I had a mastoid infection and I had to ...

i would advise anyone to think twice about having the vasodilators drugs nitrate/nitrovasodilator the ambulance give you cuz it caused me to have a stroke later, it was a nightmare, the migraine comes over you in seconds, pink lady tests in hospital they do for heart attack you feel like your gonna die from choking. its like your whole mouth swells up and you think you will swallow your tongue but I have had a phobia about since a kid and choking phobias among other phobias like swallowing, now I can actually swallow two tablets at a time which is a big step forward for me. and I gag every dam time the doctors check my throat I usually tell them now before hand so they know and apologise its just something due to being attacked as a child with a sharp instrument down my throat and i can't help it. but when you need it you don't care, you take anything.

i would advise anyone to think twice about having the vasodilators drugs nitrate/nitrovasodilator th...

since i had a few near death experiences i just don't want to know some people and i push a lot of people away for years and years. and i don't care. its only a small select few i welcome into my little world where no one can harm me anymore, like a lady said at the church to me "you have to tell people DON"T MESS WITH ME I CAN"T GET ANY BROKEN THAN THIS" and that is right.

since i had a few near death experiences i just don't want to know some people and i push a lot of p...