Que cagada... volví a mirar videos pornos... me siento una basura

La pornografía es tan degradante y vulgar... parte de la presuposición de que las mujeres son sólo objetos sexuales... y realmente perjudica nuestra relación con ellas. Hace que nos cueste tener una relación respetuosa con ellas. Por más que aparentemos respetuosidad social hacia las mujeres, en el fondo sabemos que mientras seamos adictos a las pornografías, las veremos como simples objetos sexuales y de entretenimiento descartable (porque mientras no las respetemos y las amemos de verdad como personas, sentiremos repulsión luego de que hayamos saciado nuestro impulso sexual, un vacío muy similar al que se siente luego de una noche de borrachera o dragadicción, o cualquier vicio). No se trata sólo de "mientras no hagas mal a nadie, hazlo", es un mal en sí mismo. Así como es un mal comprar productos robados (en forma directa, yo no hago mal a nadie, pero indirectamente hay un principio elemental: hay gente que roba para vender, porque hay quienes compran lo robado). Hay producciones de pornografías, porque hay gente como yo que consume. Ya no quiero consumir más.
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This confession was shared anonymously on i4giveu.com

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I am in my late 30s, married without kids. Around three months or so into my marriage, I fell in love with a co-worker. My husband was clueless, and so was my co-worker. I fell into a depression. I wanted him, not my husband. I felt that I made a very big mistake. Of marrying my husband. My appetite fell, I grew sickly and lost weight. I constantly daydreamed of being with my coworker. I hated his wife. I hated that she had him, while I was stuck in a rut of a marriage. I told my husband that I was just stressed with work. This continued on for two years. Until my co-worker and I were thrown into a project together. He was assigned to our off-shore office out of the country, and while there I began to maneuver my way into his life. I would stay up late to talk to him via skype and viber and mail. I would constantly check with him for work updates, but would also ask how he was and what was he doing. I also began to open up about how I was unhappy with my marriage. Then he told me how he wanted to play a sport, but the wife would not support him. I told him that it was his right to do what ever he wanted, that his wife is being bitchy about it. I volunteered to do things for him, brought him food, little things that I knew he would appreciate. I loved him, I was ready to do anything to get him. Little by little our communication grew. It helped that things were not good with his wife, and I would rejoice every time they would quarrel. I wanted all of him. I was amazed about how I felt about him, our connection. I loved him, and he told me he loved me too. I craved everything about him. In the meantime, I told my husband that I did not love him anymore. He asked me if there was someone else, but I said no. Then early this year, his wife found out. She called me that same day to tell me foul things. I told him that his wife was telling me all those bad things, but he didn't respond. He emailed me later on to say that he loved his wife, and that I was a mistake. That it was never a relationship at the very beginning. Now I am so sad and confused. Did he really love me? Was it ever real? I love him so much it hurts every time I see him at the office. And it hurts more because I couldn't show it in any way, not with my husband constantly watching. I am so sad and depressed. I don't know how long will I be able to play along with pretending all is okay with my husband, when I do not love him anymore. I want him, but he has not communicated with me directly since the affair was found out. I tried to ask him to talk, but he wouldn't. I

I am in my late 30s, married without kids. Around three months or so into my marriage, I fell in lov...