so this lawyer who has all these nazi 3rd Reich huge books in his cabinet was interviewing and openly masturbating himself on the other side of the desk while talking to me, that was weird, I admit I for a change took advantage of my weight loss and wore a short shift dress that was beige and crepe material and I loved the dress i couldnt believe I had the confidence to wear it or i was that thin because I was so shy and sexually un-informed or just not a flirty woman, but now and then I do dress up a bit to build up my confidence but that was a shock to me, and it was un-nerving for some really fat old guy to do that and the cops had just left because he sacked the receptionist and there had been some break in so I was like "I don't think this is the right job for me anyway", I mean I am so sexually shy it more likely to me the type to have secret crushes on men and masturbate in private its not that that really offended its the whole scene it was like some dream it strange and I was shocked a professional would openly do that at a meeting and he was strange with all the nazi stuff I would sooner talk that crap down. and it was a dodgy area at springwood. bloody strange. to openly do that at an interview its my god, man, at least you could wait til I leave, and he was acting like it was just normal ???? to do that in public ? it was no compliment anyway. he was old and married and strange. I don't think I could work in that.

so this lawyer who has all these nazi 3rd Reich huge books in his cabinet was interviewing and openly masturbating himself on the other side of the desk while talking to me, that was weird, I admit I for a change took advantage of my weight loss and wore a short shift dress that was beige and crepe material and I loved the dress i couldnt believe I had the confidence to wear it or i was that thin because I was so shy and sexually un-informed or just not a flirty woman, but now and then I do dress up a bit to build up my confidence but that was a shock to me, and it was un-nerving for some really fat old guy to do that and the cops had just left because he sacked the receptionist and there had been some break in so I was like "I don't think this is the right job for me anyway", I mean I am so sexually shy it more likely to me the type to have secret crushes on men and masturbate in private its not that that really offended its the whole scene it was like some dream it strange and I was shocked a professional would openly do that at a meeting and he was strange with all the nazi stuff I would sooner talk that crap down. and it was a dodgy area at springwood. bloody strange. to openly do that at an interview its my god, man, at least you could wait til I leave, and he was acting like it was just normal ???? to do that in public ? it was no compliment anyway. he was old and married and strange. I don't think I could work in that.
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yeh well I reckon russel was going around saying i was gay and told some other guys to stay away from me so he could have me all alone and I think ken might have done this and a few other guys, so this is why I was not getting to meet new guys openly because I always wondered why a lot of guys my own age were not more interested in me. if these assholes only knew the trouble they cause in someones life stealing the love they could have had with someone better. like lacky lee of 12 was not my ideal. and the idiot who has called me a rough diamond to be honest, at first I was offended because I was never called that by teachers and other people who knew me well infact I was told the opposite that I was very well spoken and wrote very good assignments and had a great use of the english language and articulate and teachers would tell me I was very eloquent in responses to exam assignments in such short time to deviler good arguments etc so anyway then I figured after hearing a guy talking I though ok if I am a rough diamond you want to know what I think of most of boofoon losers I have met skank class to be honest. my parents always taught me too much to be polite to rude and stupid people and tolerate them but that has no helped me much. the test of good manners is to tolerate bad my parents always used to say to me. or if you can't say something nice say nothing at all and I life by this more then not. but now I just think a rough diamond is before its prime and lusture and shine, at least if I am a rough diamond (which I don't think I am) to me a rough diamond is brash and like richard branson or trump etc, or worse, but I guess rough diamonds are in vogue in a way because we get to polish ourselves up. people are forgiving to mistakes of certain people but not others? which is strange. I don't feel like a rough diamond at all really. I am just a cranky grumpy old bitch who has been hurt, and I just tell people now when they have hurt me like somewhere forgot during all the sarina russo reprogramming depersonalization program of isolation and destruction of self worth that I even had a right to have feelings. wow what a new concept!

yeh well I reckon russel was going around saying i was gay and told some other guys to stay away fro...