... As We Forgive Those Who Trespass Against Us.

I just found this site an hour ago.  Here goes.  I abused powerless persons; persons unable to retaliate.  I also tortured wild animals I was planning on killing for sport in my youth. In first grade, a kid was throwing rocks at me, I knocked him unconscious. I have taken my Lord's name in vain. I still love my first love.  I have dealt with varying degrees of covetousness concerning her ever since she got married in '99.  I have passively pursued her in her marriage in letting our mutual friends know that if whe left him, I will always be there for her. I have been filled with hate anger and unforgiveness for various persons:  My father who abused me, friends who interfered with me and my relationship with my first love, unfair college professors and especially administrators, persons involved in my drug addictions, and co-workers.  I have learned the lesson of forgiveness, but still struggle with hate and anger.  I wasted many years of my life living in drug dens, living off of the independent wealth of my mother.  My relationship with my mother for the first thirty years was based in the majority on lies on my part. I stole $80 from my freshman colege roommate, because I felt he ripped me off on geltabs earlier.  I have changed much in the past two years.  I pray for forgiveness.      
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This confession was shared anonymously on i4giveu.com

More from 'Pride' category

I put this under waste because I've wasted my life. Here it goes. I'm bad like really bad. But looking at me you would never know. People are catching on as my life falls apart. I've been living like a quadruple life I guess. I don't even know who I am anymore. I can't think of anything I like. I hate everything and everyone. I have no friends left, the women of my life cheated lied and stole the entire time I've known them. Most of my buddies too. Just users you know. I always offer too much and people gladly accept my generosity. I always try and help but it eventually becomes them being entirely dependent on me. Then they go and I've lost so much in them. I never see the fruits of my labours. Now I'm totally alone. And financially ruined. Relying on booze and drugs to feel better about the shitty person I am. I pray to god thanking him only, not asking for more. He still rewards me a lot. Gives me great opportunity and strength to conquer challenges. But I can't conquer myself. I want to end my life. Nobody would notice except the few leeches who still cling to my generosity. Everybody I've helped is doing great. I never took time to take care of myself, or set myself up better. My friends, wife, in laws, girlfriends, and associates have all benefitted greatly from my efforts but I'm fucked mentally physically and financially. I even still protect people after they betray me. Keep their secrets, bend to their requests. I'm going to blow my brains out. I hate this world, it's ruined anyway. Goodby you fucked up people. There's a good chance that there is someone in your life going through this who helped you a lot. I bet you won't even reach out to repay what's owed. Sick fucking society world wide.

I put this under waste because I've wasted my life. Here it goes. I'm bad like really bad. But loo...