So sorry

I am so so sorry, I am sorry for not be too friendly, how can I be more. I am sorry for who I am but i don`t know better. I am sorry for my body, it`s fat, sluggy and heavy, but this is my heritage til birth. I am sorry for being sorry all the time and actually, I dont feel sorry at all. This is who i am fat, lazy, addicted, social handicapped and a 30yrs old virgin. fuck all of you. I have a good heart and compation but I cant express my love. I had open my heart before give a chance to trust life, but I failed. I can not let go my old habbits. I am doomed to lonely life and rotten jobs. my only ease is in the food, drugs and TV, it is so boring. I dont have any where to escape any more I fustrate and furios I hate this fucking life and afraid to live them. mostly i afraid from the time that tun day after day, year after year like crazy. I getting old and crazy. soon, I will need help, my pride will not let me reach my hand for help, I had a liitle bit sence of Panic. what should I do? I have all the answers, like I always had. I have the potential I dont have the power to concive it. that`s my story, this is my tragedy.
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I I I ME ME ME that's all I see. self proclaimed superiority I am full of guilt and shame. I should be so much more . I have been given so many opportunities, and I piss in their face. I am never satisfied. I have been happy, truly, genuinely, first reactionary, happy twice. I'm no fool. These thought processes are recognized, and purposely counterweighted with false positivity. A doctor would give me drugs. I will give myself what they call drugs. I'll help you out brother. If your eyes could only see the nights sky as it was intended, as it actually is, not a washed out reflection of man made energies, then we surely would not be discussing such a depressing topic. If you lived with the drive that drove our ancestors to survive, not thrive, you would know yourself, not wholly but more. I I I ME ME ME that's all I see. self proclaimed superiority Full of guilt and shame, should be so much more . Have been given much opportunity, piss cunts in their face. Never satisfied. Been happy, truly, genuinely, first reactionary, happy(2). Not a fool. Recognized thought processes, purposely counterweighted with false positivity. A doctor would give drugs. Take what they call drugs. To help others. ifYour eyes could only see the nights sky as it was intended, as it actually is, not a washed out reflection of mistaken energies, then surely depression would lessen. If we lived the drive that drove our ancestors to survive, not thrive, we would know, not wholly but more. The above applies, this is known fully. For what is the point if it isn't to feel good and good and good then better and better and better then great then great all while spreading disease of infinite disappointment(joy). Be willing to accept the fact that everything learned, everything shared with the world today, could be false. No respect to those who do not. However unlikely, we must accept that COULD be wrong. This will free us, such as it did, and will. The answer to the question you are asking now, RIGHT NOW, THIS VERY MOMENT IN THIS CURRENT TIME...IS.... Yes. I am.would you be willing to accept the fact that everything you have learned, everything you have shared with the world today, could in fact be false? I don't respect anyone who can not admit that. However unlikely, you must accept that you COULD be wrong. This will free you, such as it did myself. The answer to the question you are asking yourself now, RIGHT NOW, THIS VERY MOMENT IN THIS CURRENT TIME...IS.... Yes. I am.

I I I ME ME ME that's all I see. self proclaimed superiority I am full of guilt and shame. I shou...