My English is really poor, so forgive me for my English

My English is really poor, so forgive me for my English and trust my confession. I'd like to confess all the bad things that i have done. First, i am really sloth. i know what to do but i never do them, even a little bit. i never pay any effort for my study, even though i know how much my parents have paid for my oversea study. and i lie to them, i am really sorry. for my boy friend, i lie to him and never tell him, i am really sorry. for my family, i lie to them about my parents, i am really sorry. for my friends, i have lied to them, almost everything, i am so jealous and stupid, i am really sorry and want to change it. i am such a stupid person, i want to suicide all th time but fear to death. i eat so much and never lose fat. i have no self control. Oh, dear God, please help me, sincerelly, i nead your help, please lead me, i really want to be a better person. i am really sorry. i appolisize for all the bad things i have done. Sorry!