Confessions about 'Hate'

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now your supposed to say "oh god what have I done?" and feel so guilty and ashamed of your selfishness,within the said game!

now your supposed to say "oh god what have I done?" and feel so guilty and ashamed of your selfishne...

Hate

my specialist said yana and other stupid people don't know what they are talking about when saying my antidepressants and calmatives are illegal drugs, because they are not illegal drugs. I don't shoot up or take illegal drugs and I am sick of this homocide against me. sick of it. I could murder the people who have done this to me. the police should do a mercy killings on my behalf to these torturers. I don't have to tolerate their senile stupid talk.

my specialist said yana and other stupid people don't know what they are talking about when saying ...

Abuse, Hate

the thing that came as a shock to me is just because someone is a doctor or ambulance person doesn't mean they don't have criminal intent in their actions to you. it took a lot for me to see this for myself. I used to have blind trust in doctors, my fave doctor who was a good doctor was Dr Frazer and he never ever once put me down for having depression or being sexually abused or that I couldn't afford medical bills all the time, unlike some other doctors. but there are not a lot of doctors around like him. I mean today they want you to come for 1 item per visit, when I used to see dr f he was like always following up on last visit and checking meds and seeing how it went even minor things always never once had to remind him to check BP or anything. I have not had as good a doctor as him since. he was a great doctor. but I don't have faith in medical people now after being bullied and abused by some. its not their place to abuse patients. if they want to do that go join the prison system or the death row prisoners in usa don't bother doing this job if you don't like actually caring about people who most times are afraid. some where out and out pig dirty rude to me, and I will never forget that feeling of betrayal. its not nice at all. you might think your funny and rich but there are richer clever and more handsome men out there then you. its like ken, he really thought he was something hot and he was so weak and cowardly he didn't even call medical aide or a fireman or police or someone when I collapsed. the guy is a loser user! or the worst kind said one police officer to me.

the thing that came as a shock to me is just because someone is a doctor or ambulance person doesn't...

Abuse, Hate

I find I don't feel like a great person around certain people, they don't make me feel good when I am with them at all. it has always felt like I have been the one having to put that extra mile in, the extra smile, the added extras to boast up other peoples ego or confidence or feelings of comfortability and being understanding and compassionate and giving compliments and consider others feelings but not many people retrun in kind! so I feel just so worn out giving and getting nothing back in return. I rarely get that effort back to what I put in with people, they don't give back all I need they I have given them. then they wonder why I am tired irritable and sad and depressed because they just over use me.

I find I don't feel like a great person around certain people, they don't make me feel good when I a...

Hate

I never know when men are attracted to me. I never knew when they liked me, because most ones that liked me I didn't like them and we had nothing in common, they would be uneducated never bothered to get off their ass to go to university or work in a office job, or buy a car or do much with themselves, I have had a lot of stupid ugly old boofheads with no class and no academic back ground, and their intests are like the drive through at KFC and stupid yobo stuff I am not. and I look at them and think "what the hell would make you think I want to go out with you?" I met one guy who dropped out of university and he was very very good looking and he went back later to study like me. he was sort of like me he had had health issues and emotional problems the whole time. but I never went out with him only talk to him on transport. weird men working in the railway would do stupid things to me as if like I was strange for crossing my arms and say stupid things at me like they were old and seemed to think I was stupid even bothering to go to university. saying "SO WHAT DO YOU DO? A BACHELOR DEGREE HEY, OH SO YOU WANT TO BE A BACHELOR DO YOU?" and make fun of me like as if that would win them a like tick with me. one guy after I was in the car accident literally insulted me and called me a "Vegetable" just because I was sitting playing a computer game on the weekend on the floor with my cousins. my sisters first husbands family were extremely abusive towards us and they were all weird and arrogant, the cousins and aunties and sibblings were all weird so we up and left and didn't stay for any food after a number of insulting parties where we were made fun of about unemployment or education or money etc. only they were important and would openly make fun of us, so did my brothers godparents kids and my older cousins make fun of us all the time. I really should have done it back like my therapists told me to, but I just told them I was sick of their abuse and set strong boundaries and wish for a no communication code with them or ken carey and girls like jackie and katy martin who bashed me at school and nick and his shifty drunk frump attacking me bashing I just told them I didn't want that in my life. other people in alp and that dam mongrel tonya who went around saying I gave her bills tablets she was a blonde bitch. she needed a good kick up the bum, she hit into me as well and she was a spoilt crazy bitch who married young and was a spoilt nob. I didn't do a thing to these idiots. there is so many people I just don't want around me. I have to be extra selective now about the company I keep, I am usually caring and non-judgmental but tell you this much. I believe that I was set up to tell anita off and margie made it clear to me from day 1 that their choir wouldn't be for me, she said "you might come to 3 lessons and think this is not for me" which said to me "I DONT WANT YOU HERE FUCK OFF" which was similar to anita's approach as well and a few therapist like at evolve and cause and effucked, and restore- mary was rude to me, as was mirranda. I never judges anna-maria for her past but she went weird and I couldn't cope with her crap! I had too much issues of my own and she was just out of control flirting acting crazy and I will not be around women once they do this I avoid them, I learnt this from my days around brigette, mum and others know I won't tolerate it at all around me, I just up and leave when girls act stupid and sexual and bitchy and boucey and weirdo and I won't have a thing to do with women like that. mary at retore offended me saying I don't need to ask men to meet my parents on first date, sorry my rules are my rules, how she runs her life is not my problem, how I run my life is my choice and my business. I am a no non-sense no messing around and playing funny buggers with me sort of person. and I could be tempted to up and hit someone I have not done that but after katy robinson bashed me I hope someone bashed her back and she should keep out of other peoples business like kelly who causes trouble everywhere she goes pretending to be a friend when she is just a back stabber. I met a lot of women like her, even worse ones. I have met a lot of assholes in my time and its a wonder I am a nice person because I should have been a asshole a long time ago. but I can still hate people.

I never know when men are attracted to me. I never knew when they liked me, because most ones that l...

Abuse, Hate

I gave up courses also when guys rejected me at university because it was easier then having to see their cunt faces with bullying whore dogs who has either verbally or physically attacked me for them. so i just up and left.

I gave up courses also when guys rejected me at university because it was easier then having to see ...

Pride, Hate

I will look up the name of that springwood lawyer who was masturbating opening at me at a job interview, and also the bitch at the body bar that later became the Milique spa, there was a complete dog bitch rude in their to me. also fernwood capalaba gave me a rash virus they deserve that done back to them, the people at the Hogsbreath Cafe at Indoorpilly or somewhere were rude to me so were the staff at the alex hills taven with my legal friends, one day the woman at Snug Home said to me "feel free to leave" in 2008, there were some ass holes I worked with at the mercure hotel and also at terry whites pharmacy capalaba one boucing ex army bitch was very abusive towards me picked on me the whole time and the pharmacy guild were rude too. also at griffith university the office faculty admin there was one bitch who was abusive to me, literally in 1993 everywhere I sat she made me move and it felt like bullying! and certain teachers talking about smut and people "cum" talk in lectures that made me sick, also there was a history teacher at bayside tafe sheriden who was a complete stuck up blonde bitch who used to pick on me and benet a lot and at school I was bullied by a lot of teachers. when we went to see taxiride a group of journalist pushed all us paying people out of their way to get front row and were the most rude uppty whore slut bitch dogs who couldn't even smile at anyone with their dolly bird make up and rich designer wear and blonde fake hair - they had these big jouralism jobs and there was some real cunts at con sciaccas firm too. and the office of state revenue major slut whore dog snotty noise rich bitches there who made life hell for junors and new staff and the sexist bullying was scary. one woman literally had me in tears at russo's in 2005 phylis who was a complete mongrel fat short bitch who had been a mother and other people in the room had more skills then her, also I was verbally attacked at curves cleveland to the point I left crying when a trainer got up me for some minor thing, a tennis coach attacked the shit out of me one day in 1999 to the point I never went back. there were nameless amounts of rude black tall dolly bird bitches at centerlink one who was some catwalk model who was abusive to my me and my mother over my fathers carers pension- she deliberately made sure he couldn't get it and he had to reapply and got it the second time, the bullying by jeniffer bell and bernedette hodges was beyond it. they were so rude and abusive. nutters! jealous over nothing. not one young woman around my age and working or studying in law or business or anything I studied would talk to me with their plastic faces and cars and designer clothing. not one was friendly and I only ever mixed with the rejects and NERDS and the people the POPULAR WHORES made fun of, all through university and college and bands and school.

I will look up the name of that springwood lawyer who was masturbating opening at me at a job interv...

Abuse, Hate

i was never really a upperty rude teen or young adult that is where I went wrong. I should have been a complete mongrel blonde bitch to everyone and been very very very rude, as if I could equal the rudeness people did to me. but one day I might!

i was never really a upperty rude teen or young adult that is where I went wrong. I should have been...

Pride, Hate

my therapists told me to tell people to fuck off and to be rude to people, so they get the message I don't have to take their bullshit! I don't like being rude, but if people are rude to me I will do it back to them 100 times!

my therapists told me to tell people to fuck off and to be rude to people, so they get the message I...

Hate

I should have spent all the money on rooting around like a whore everywhere while travelling instead of wasting it at university and tafe and college and furniture. its just that I was told by getting educated it would improve employment and it didn't. we needed new furniture because it was falling down and 2nd hand and broken, I bought some new bits and 2nd hand and I was still made to feel guilty helping my parents out. I wasted money on pharmacy certificates and technician courses but once again I was stupid thinking I would get work. its impossible for me to get work. everything is a waste of time. I should have demanded a law suit on my parents for allowing a pedo in our home as a child and spent the money rooting around travelling like a prostitute. I was dumb. I actually thought at the time I was doing the right thing getting counselling and study - what a crock of shit !

I should have spent all the money on rooting around like a whore everywhere while travelling instead...

Hate

no victory for the honest- I am proof of that. don't make me laugh I might die from laughter if you said good people actually win! you are so funny it makes me sick really.

no victory for the honest- I am proof of that. don't make me laugh I might die from laughter if you ...

Abuse, Hate

there is no victory in life for honest good people, only violent scammers win. don't fool yourself.

there is no victory in life for honest good people, only violent scammers win. don't fool yourself....

Abuse, Hate

lazy doctors who don't test pathology and xrays etc that is the dark side and people consumed with hatred and evil dirty git games and that makes it hard for the good doctors and patients are suffering ...

lazy doctors who don't test pathology and xrays etc that is the dark side and people consumed with h...

Abuse, Hate

the bullies are winning sadly in this world, kindness is too late to the good like me, where so broken for so long, I don't even see a future for myself anymore.

the bullies are winning sadly in this world, kindness is too late to the good like me, where so brok...

Abuse, Hate

nlp holocaust/nlp deaths happening now https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXy2zU_HPWs&t=1498s

Abuse, Hate, Violence

of course your suck a selfish rich dirty old man john laws you wouldn't know what it was like to give up your life to look after someone elses child. you wouldn't know what it was like suffering out this abuse. you bully spastic old dirty old man. so don't you DAM WELL START ON ME YOU SON OF A DIRTY UGLY SLUT!

of course your suck a selfish rich dirty old man john laws you wouldn't know what it was like to gi...

Abuse, Hate

I gave up university 4 times. 1st when I was bashed and when I was ill and due to money not affording books and the stress to my health. I got into a nursing degree and didn't take it up I knocked it back. I didn't feel I had enough intelligence to do science based courses, I didn't think I could cope with the stresses of the job. I gave up law because everytime I sat in policing or legal classes or court cases while studying it just upset me witth my own child abuse and rape traumas. I had no friends the whole time. study was lonely. life has been lonely. I gave a lot of courses in pathology in 2006 due to illnesss, I gave up a mediation and arbitation diploma when I got cancer. I gave up a few other courses. I tried to do dental 3 times and just couldn't financially afford it and medical bills and their bullshit at the colleges.

I gave up university 4 times. 1st when I was bashed and when I was ill and due to money not affordin...

Abuse, Hate

to be honest tafe and university it not everything. because doing other learning and documentaries or short courses help build up bit by bit. we used to do 3 or 4, 20hr a week subjects and it didn't help me much. I admit I was lazy and could have studied more but I was depressed a lot because I had never been allowed to deal with the child sexual abuse stuff. what annoys me with virgina and shirley is that they had degrees in social welfare etc but the shit they were saying was upsetting me. firstly. to say kids who are abused who get help earlier in life are no better off is a absolute lie. the quicker you get police and psychological and educational support the better. secondly, to say that because I was abused means I am more likly to be a pedo myself is again another lie, I don't think you know how this made me cry and cry and feel like I was doomed and then others believed your bullshit. then 3rdly to say kids innocently sexually exploring other kids is the same as a pedo was the biggest lie and hurt, because in that case you would have every child of 10 or 14 labeled pedos any kind who had a little girlfriend or boyfriend or in teens because you made out that it doesn't matter if kids are molested at 4 or 14 and I disagree, I didn't have a choice. I was 4 when it started or younger with older kids but about 4 with the pedo, and yet you make out a teen of 16 being molested is equal when I was molested by an old man for 10 years from the age of 4. by 15-16 I stood up to him and had enough and got angry and then I was made to feel like a bad naughty child for getting angry. WELL EXCUSE ME!

to be honest tafe and university it not everything. because doing other learning and documentaries o...

Pride, Hate

I don't know I think even adults struggle knowing where you fit in when your bullied and pushed around everywhere and don't have employment and good healthy relationships. I became more confused when I got to 35 not married not having kids or job and questioning why did I bother going to university, why can't I get ahead? worse than when I was a teen. if you're not working and not a mother by 35 in the awful country Australia I live you're a nobody that a lot of doctors won't treat properly and with respect and with dignity, you don't get the same access to legal rights or medical access as other people and special "mother" treatments and treated like you know anything. unless you have given birth here you know nothing and are good for nothing! a lot of single mothers and obvious disability people with server disability don't know their boundaries and limitations here they are not taught enough "sit down and mind your own business and shut up" it really makes you feel hurt, weird and like you must be extra stupid when deformed intellectually disabled people want to give you advice as if you have never had a thought of your own. I was at university I don't know about kelly if she did or didn't but did she ever stop to think I had tried that and already thought of that. I am clever enough to know I don't know it all. but intellectually disabled don't.

I don't know I think even adults struggle knowing where you fit in when your bullied and pushed arou...

Abuse, Hate

if I try to talk about any personal passion project like work or research or anything I do, or what I am working on people don't care.

if I try to talk about any personal passion project like work or research or anything I do, or what ...

Hate