I am depressed :-(

my doctor told me to go and have a way down and read for a while if my back starts aching, often I just have to ignore it and work and walk through the pain, I mean you can't sit at home or lay down when it is painful and appreciate it after you been out but I often just keep working and walking because the pain will be there anyway. its like bad period pain all the time so I don't even notice my period pain unless its really server like a few months back it was and I woke up my mum and said, "ah, am I going to die ?" the pain was so bad. i hate it like yesterday I had migraine and I thought I was going to vomit and the neck aches with it, todays the first day I have been out in a week since the surgery because everytime I got up it just started bleeding again. and I had to postpone my back/brain surgeon appt cuz I just can not afford all these surgical procedures at once and I pay top cover hospital with top extras and they won't cover a surgical procedure with the gyno for byopsies or my back surgeon. my cat gets more paid for them on his pet insurance then I do on my health fund. I added obstretrics incase I do have a baby. - as if- a mirical would have to happen! I am so ugly and old and so worried about my health. I want a baby desperately and marriage to feel normal. its just so immoral that people have kids and don't appreciate it and here is me I want children and marriage and I want to work part-time. I just don't need russo nazi agression bullying over work.

my doctor told me to go and have a way down and read for a while if my back starts aching, often I ...

I had to close my mothers bedroom window to stop the smell of marijuana coming in at night and to stop hearing them fucking loudly on trampolines, i mean it makes you feel dirty having to listen to that without even straining this loud sex and giggling, so I shut the windows permanently while I study at night often on IT or health or something.

I had to close my mothers bedroom window to stop the smell of marijuana coming in at night and to st...

the slut whore next door wrote a letter saying good to see your cleaning up the front yard, keep up the good work. to my mother just because she cut back the plumbaygo scrub. I mean, I just want to say to that spastic whore next door to mind her own business, mum and dad don't like her, my sister does not like her and I don't like her, we don't like them. he acts like a pig in his big truck on drugs and was asking dad what was wrong just because my sister was having one of trantrum mental fits... she is the one that is sick of the smell of the chooks near the kitchen window, and the old woman grandma called shirley waving at her, my sister said "I don't want them looking at me or waving at me, I don't want to know any of them". I just hate our neighbors like dad said "its not the neighborhood it used to be when there was nice people living in the street 20 years ago" donna and her slut whore daughters and courtney have made the street a prostitute hooker whore street, no wonder she got a job working for lj hooker. my dad does not like fat bully brutus chris next door anyway. I don't like her smug superior ways she thinks she is better then everyone in this street wiggling her ass around our house one day and she is annoying. I just want nothing to do with her she is evil satanic and mum said she is going to pretend she knows nothing and for all of us to just play along and like the song momma mia -its a game we play. let the fuckhole cunts they are work it out for themselves. does she love herself working in real estate or what? its not much, they are all con artists and criminals in real estate. she is evil. I knew that woman was trouble like donna from the day they moved into this street. donna and linda expect us to live like slave pigs while they and their daughters stole young men on us. I told a govt offical they were getting their sex male clients to park outside our house while she serviced them. its going too far. then she was getting the kids in the middle of davo and others, and then she writes, "so if you think we don't get along with neighbors think again" she thinks she is so clever then anyone else telling us what questions to think for ourselves rather then just coming over and saying "oh I am sorry the chooks have been messing up your garden and the dog nearly attacked you" to my mum. mum is 76 and this fat man of 30 expects my mother to fix a fence when they are rich enough and got youth on their side to fix it themselves. no one here has a husband to help because they won't let us have husbands cuz they were stealing them on us.

the slut whore next door wrote a letter saying good to see your cleaning up the front yard, keep up ...