im a liar and a loser and i hate myself

i had just recently finished my mid year exams.....my mum is very annoying bout how i hav 2 study all the time to get good marks.i hav been lying to her all the time saying i hav studied when i didnt even touch my books at all.i feel bad about this.should i just tell her i havnt been studying or just keep on lying to her about it?i love my mum but i just dont feel the motivation 2 go and study.plz i dont know wat i shuld do.....i dont want 2 lie but if i dont then she wuld b sad about me not trying my best..... in another cenario my group of frends met this other group of girls and our 2 groups started hanging out alot.i liked this girl but my frend also liked her 2.....but meanwhile the girl found out that we both liked her.then i told the girl and my frend that i wuld let my frend try 2 date her and stuff.i kept doin this and i made the girl feel really bad and like a toy bcoz we just kept passing her around.i dont feel very good and i think she lieks me but i think i dont like her anymore....i dont know if i liek her or not....she keeps on making me think she likes me and then the next second she givs me the impression that she dusnt.wat shuld i do?shuld i still let my frend go 4 her or do i just like ring out?and a few days ago i saw sum pictures of her frend and i thought she was pretty hot....am i a dikhed bcoz i like whoever i c?bcoz now i wanna hook up with the girls frend...i feel like a dik.....liking the frend of the girl i had just liked.....am i unforgivable or just selfish?i duno if i shuld still b liking the frend of the girl or shuld i not like her 2 b a bit moral in a sense.....i dont know..... plz help me
20

Next post in 20s

Will redirect automatically

This confession was shared anonymously on i4giveu.com

More from 'Love' category

I put this under waste because I've wasted my life. Here it goes. I'm bad like really bad. But looking at me you would never know. People are catching on as my life falls apart. I've been living like a quadruple life I guess. I don't even know who I am anymore. I can't think of anything I like. I hate everything and everyone. I have no friends left, the women of my life cheated lied and stole the entire time I've known them. Most of my buddies too. Just users you know. I always offer too much and people gladly accept my generosity. I always try and help but it eventually becomes them being entirely dependent on me. Then they go and I've lost so much in them. I never see the fruits of my labours. Now I'm totally alone. And financially ruined. Relying on booze and drugs to feel better about the shitty person I am. I pray to god thanking him only, not asking for more. He still rewards me a lot. Gives me great opportunity and strength to conquer challenges. But I can't conquer myself. I want to end my life. Nobody would notice except the few leeches who still cling to my generosity. Everybody I've helped is doing great. I never took time to take care of myself, or set myself up better. My friends, wife, in laws, girlfriends, and associates have all benefitted greatly from my efforts but I'm fucked mentally physically and financially. I even still protect people after they betray me. Keep their secrets, bend to their requests. I'm going to blow my brains out. I hate this world, it's ruined anyway. Goodby you fucked up people. There's a good chance that there is someone in your life going through this who helped you a lot. I bet you won't even reach out to repay what's owed. Sick fucking society world wide.

I put this under waste because I've wasted my life. Here it goes. I'm bad like really bad. But loo...